Bernadette: Can I get you anything? Juice box? 'nanas?
Amy: 'nanas?
Bernadette: Sorry. Mom brain. I think I've forgot how to talk to grown-ups. I meant Ba-nanas.

Howard: I'm sorry I didn't take you to the airport. I just want you to know I'll never forgive myself for being so selfish. And I promise to keep you close for the rest of my life.
Bernadette: Oh, no, that thing's gonna end up in my bedroom.

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?

Bernadette: (Shouting from the bathroom) How many times do I have to tell you to replace the toilet paper when it's empty?
Howard: I'm in the middle of something.
Bernadette: So am I!

Sheldon: You know what they say, fool me "N" times, where "N" equals the amount of times you've already fooled me, shame on you. Fool me "N" plus one times, shame on me.

Penny: I'm not leaving you for Bill Gates.
Leonard: You sure? I bet his Internet's really fast.

Raj: But why do they still call Batman using the Bat-Signal? Wouldn't it just be, like, easier to text him?
Howard: The Bat-Signal isn't just to alert Batman, it's also to strike fear in the hearts of his enemies and let them know he's coming.
Leonard: Sort of like Sheldon's knock.
Sheldon: Comparing me to Batman? I'll take it.