Howard: Anyway, if you guys could apologize, it'd be a big help.
Amy: Oh, we'd be happy to apologize to her as soon as she apologizes to me for not making you apologize to Sheldon.
Howard: I didn't follow that, but, then, between my wife and that guacamole, I didn't get a lot of sleep last night.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Howard: I invented a game. Want to play?
Leonard: Sure.
Howard: It's called Emily or Cinnamon. I give you actual quotes I've heard Raj say, and you guess if he was talking to his girlfriend or his dog.

Bernadette: Does your mother call you every day at work to see if you had a healthy lunch?
Howard: My mother calls me every day at work to see if I had a healthy bowel movement.

Leonard: Oh, my God, you look amazing.
Raj: I find you guilty of murder, because you are killing it.
Howard: (imitating Sheldon) Well, technically, the Supreme Court wouldn't determine a defendant's guilt or innocence in a criminal matter. They could only reverse or revamp a jury's conviction based on a constitutional or statutory issue.

Raj: Hey, did you guys know this year's the 40th anniversary of Halloween?
Sheldon: Oh, nonsense. Halloween traditions of date back to the Celtic festival of Samhain. Although our current Halloween customs come from the evening before All Hallows' Day, All Hallows' Eve. Thus, Halloween.
Raj: I meant the movie Halloween.
Sheldon: Oh. Well, that's not interesting at all.
Leonard: Did you know the Michael Myers mask from the film was actually a Captain Kirk mask turned inside out?
Sheldon: Okay, now it's interesting.

Sheldon: Oh, Inspector Gadget. And I want to say Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Raj: So close. Kooth Bader Ginsburg. The Notorious KBG.
Sheldon: That's very clever.
Raj: [striking a gavel] Sustained.