Big Bang Theory Quote 11969

Quote from Howard in the episode The Plagiarism Schism

Howard: Listen, I did something kind of stupid today.
Bernadette: Okay.
Howard: I went to The Cheesecake Factory to try to figure out who that waitress was.
Bernadette: Howie.
Howard: Don't worry, I didn't find out, because I realized I didn't even care. While I was there, I started asking myself, "Why does this mean anything to me?" And I guess the truth is it was all about my vanity. And why should I need to be validated by another woman liking me when the best woman in the world already loves me? And I just wanted you to know that. [chuckles]
Bernadette: The restaurant manager already called. You really creeped a lot of people out.
Howard: And I regret that. [chuckles] Because the only woman I want to creep out is the mother of my children.
Bernadette: Well, you're off to a good start.


Howard Quotes

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Quote from the episode The Proton Displacement

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Quote from the episode The Fortification Implementation

Howard: Settle this. Those little animated pictures on the Internet, are they called "gifs" or "jifs"?
Leonard: Well, the G stands for "graphics." That's a hard G, so I'd say "gif."
Raj: What? The guy who invented it says it's "jif."
Howard: I'm sorry, do you mean the guy or the juy?

'The Plagiarism Schism' Quotes

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: So I was talking to my mom about our Pemberton and Campbell situation.
Amy: Really? What'd she say?
Sheldon: Apparently, Old Testament God would bring down his wrath on them for being deceitful, but New Testament God would forgive them.
Amy: So couldn't we just bring down our wrath and ask the New Testament God to forgive us?
Sheldon: You know, I asked her that very question.
Amy: And?
Sheldon: She said I was full of California sass.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Are you all right? You seem distracted.
Amy: Yeah, sorry. I'm just trying to figure something out.
Sheldon: Is it what to get me for our anniversary? 'Cause I'll give you a hint: it's already in my Amazon basket. Just click "buy now." I filled out the gift card for you. Apparently, I'm the light of your life.

Quote from Barry Kripke

Amy: I don't know, Barry. It sounds a little sleazy.
Barry Kripke: Well, let me know if you change your mind. Sleazy is where I thrive.