Penny: Okay, help me out here. How does an archaeology professor get that good with a whip?
Howard: Maybe he took a class at the adult bookstore. That's how I learned.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Howard: So you can never take it (the sweater) off?
Leonard: No.
Raj: Not even to sleep?
Leonard: No.
Howard: So you're just an idiot?
Leonard: It's called proving a point.
Howard: Is the point you're an idiot?

Bernadette: Maybe we should get one of those machines to help her up the stairs.
Howard: You mean a fork lift?

Bernadette: Besides, Penny and I are having a girl's night tonight.
Amy: Girls night, what does that entail?
Bernadette: Oh you know, girls get together hang out share girl talk.
Amy: I'm a girl.
Bernadette: Oh well maybe you could join us. I'll ask Penny.
Amy: No need, Penny and I are very close.
Leonard: You are?
Amy: Yes, In fact our mensies are synchronized.

Sheldon: Under normal circumstances I'd say I told you so. But, as I have told you so with such vehemence and frequency already, the phrase has lost all meaning. Therefore, I will be replacing it with the phrase, "I have informed you thusly".

Sheldon: No cuts, no buts, no coconuts.