Sheldon: I've never played Dungeons and Dragons with girls.
Penny: It's okay, honey, no one has.

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Howard: A satanic fungus that looks suspiciously like Al Pacino rises from the forest floor and says, (Imitating Al Pacino) "You're playing D&D. You're playing D&D. This whole apartment is playing D&D."

Amy: Go away. Sheldon is nibbling on my ... fourteen! Yes!

Sheldon: See what happens when you let girls play D & D.