Howard: You just started seeing women naked again. I don't want you to be confused about where the boobs should be.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Howard: I invented a game. Want to play?
Leonard: Sure.
Howard: It's called Emily or Cinnamon. I give you actual quotes I've heard Raj say, and you guess if he was talking to his girlfriend or his dog.

Bernadette: Does your mother call you every day at work to see if you had a healthy lunch?
Howard: My mother calls me every day at work to see if I had a healthy bowel movement.

Sheldon: I feel renewed. I'm ready to deal with any changes that come my way. [sees Penny] Your hair is different. You changed your hair. I can't take this. I'm out.

Dan: You're scared of Bernadette?
Penny: Yeah, kinda.
Dan: I thought it was just me! Everyone thinks she's so nice with the little squeaky voice!

Sheldon: Leonard, as soon as we get home, I want to have coitus with Amy. [checks for Amy's reaction] Okay, she can't hear.