Howard: We're betting to see if Koothrappali can hold his breath longer than the disk can spin.
Sheldon: Its weight and smoothness, along with the slight concavity of the mirror, means it can spin for a long time.
Leonard: But Raj is from India, which means he's no slouch at holding his breath.

Sheldon: I remember the song! It's called "Darlin'" by the Beach Boys! Oh, thank goodness! I'm not crazy! I don't have to take a pigeon as my bride!
Leonard: There goes our shot at him living on the roof.

Sheldon: This song is never going to stop. Have you ever dealt with something so relentlessly irritating?
Leonard: That's a trick question, right?

Leonard: My point is, while you're spending all this time on your own, building computers or practicing your cello, what you're really doing is becoming interesting. When people finally do notice you, they're gonna find someone a lot cooler than they thought. And for those of you that were popular in high school, it's over, sorry. Thank you. Congratulations.

Amy: What is this?
Sheldon: I'm mapping basic topics of conversation and with whom they can be discussed.
I call these circles "Zones of Privacy". Don't Google that unless you want to see pictures of people's genitals.

Bert: I met her on G-Harmony. That's a Web site for geologists to find love.
Amy: That's a real thing?
Bert: Yeah. Their slogan is "We're all about dating and not the carbon-14 kind".

Sheldon: Two years ago I got my driver's license.
Amy: What? Why didn't you say anything?!
Sheldon: I like being chauffeured around. It makes me feel important.
Amy: So when I got up at 4:00 AM to drive you across the desert to an antique train museum, I didn't have to?
Sheldon: No, you didn't. But keep in mind, I felt extremely important.