Howard: Hey. Nice sweater.
Leonard: Yeah, Stephanie got it for me. It's kind of fun.
Raj: It's got a big bird on it, dude.
Leonard: Yeah, yeah, that's the fun part. We're also getting new curtains for my bedroom, and a dust ruffle, and a duvet, and I don't even know what a duvet is but I'm pretty sure if I did I wouldn't want one, but every time I talk to her about moving out she cries and we have sex.
Raj: You're lucky. With me, it's usually the other way around.

Raj: Amy, good luck getting these guys excited about a dinner with a theme. I gave up when no one cared about my Tom Hanks-Giving.

Raj: Oh man, first monster I see I'm gonna sneak up behind him, whip out my wand and shoot my magic all over his ass!
Stuart: Do you hear yourself when you say these things?

Raj: Doesn't anyone have a rod of resurrection? Because if you've got one, I need it bad. Get in here with your rod and give it to me.
Stuart: Okay, you need to say these things in your head before you say them out loud.

Stephanie: I don't see anything at all, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Well, you're the doctor, but I am constantly hearing this annoying sound.
Leonard: Me too.
Sheldon: Is it a high frequency whistle?
Leonard: No, it's more of a relentless, narcissistic drone.

Leonard: Don't you think if a woman was living with me I'd be the first one to know about it?
Penny: Oh, sweetie, you'd be the last one to know about it.

Sheldon: I trust Leonard satisfied you sexually last night.
Leonard: Oh good God! Sheldon we don't ask questions like that!
Sheldon: I heard you ask it over and over. How is it inappropriate for me to ask it once?
Stephanie: He did very nicely.
Sheldon: See? She's not offended. And now you finally have an answer.