Penny: You want to talk about crazy mothers, Leonard's mom wouldn't give him any sort of approval growing up.
Priya: Oh, the poor thing.
Penny: It makes him desperate to please women. That's why the foreplay goes on and on.
Priya: It does, doesn't it?
Penny: It's like he's trying to win a prize. A word of advice, don't doze off. You will never hear the end of it.

Sheldon: Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.
Penny: Yeah, well your Ken can kiss my Barbie.

Leonard: What am I supposed to do?
Penny: Err, keep your mouth off other women.

Leonard: If I take it off, Sheldon wins.
Penny: Sweetie, every night you don't kill him in his sleep, he wins.

Howard: Hell hound.
Raj: Who let the satanic dogs out?

Sheldon: Oh, what fresh hell is this?
Biosuit Nurse: Wait, you can't leave here, you've been exposed.
Sheldon: (Covering his face with his shirt) No, I haven't. It's all good.

Raj: Sheldon, that's my water.
Sheldon: Oh, dear Lord!
Leonard: That's not your water.
Raj: I know.