Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 47 of 77
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Raj: It's interesting your father didn't help around the house and Howard doesn't help, either, so in a way, Howard's not only like your father, but he's also like the child that you're afraid to have.
Howard: Why are you still here?
Raj: Fine, I'll leave. But it sounds like somebody needs a fresh diaper.
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Mike Rostenkowski: You gonna be okay down here?
Howard: Yeah. Yeah, I feel like an archaeologist. Indiana Jones and the Single-Family Dwelling.
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Howard: Look, uh I don't even think you can take this wall down 'cause it's load-bearing.
Raj: Well, it's easy to find out. Just go into the crawlspace under the house and check.
Howard: When is your visa up?
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Bernadette: Whatcha doing?
Howard: Oh! Making myself a bologna sandwich like my mom used to make me after my dad left, but before she died.
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Howard: But what room?
Bernadette: How 'bout this one?
Howard: No way. No, this is the room I associate the most with my mom.
Bernadette: Then how 'bout the bathroom?
Howard: I want to change my answer.
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Bernadette: Hey. You got a minute?
Howard: Not really. Visigoths are kind of up my butt right now.
Bernadette: Pause the game, Howard.
Howard: "Howard?" Uh-oh. Make room, Visigoths.
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Bernadette: Look, I get that you grew up here and you're attached to things looking a certain way, but I want this to feel like my house, too.
Howard: Oh, honey, of course it's your house. Why else would you be cleaning it all the time?
Quote from the episode The Spock Resonance
Howard: May I say something?
Bernadette: Is it about how I can't have new wallpaper 'cause your dad left when you were little and your mom died?
Howard: Never mind.
Quote from the episode The Helium Insufficiency
Bernadette: Ew, check out his tiny teeth. He looks like a man-dolphin.
Penny: Wait, if he's good in bed, she can throw him a fish.
Howard: (high-pitched) I love you, Amy. (dolphin sounds)
Quote from the episode The Helium Insufficiency
Penny: Where do we stand on cross-eyed Mike?
Raj: You know he won't be looking at other girls.
Howard: Unless they're sitting on the end of his nose.
Quote from the episode The Helium Insufficiency
Bernadette: Hey, I thought you were gonna be out late?
Howard: If you wanted me to stay out later, you should've given me more spending money.
Quote from the episode The Helium Insufficiency
Amy: Uh, excuse me, can I have my phone back?
Howard: Hang on, I'm trying to find you the next great love of your life. The man who will father your children.
Okay, yes or no on white guy with dreadlocks?
Quote from the episode The Perspiration Implementation
Sheldon: Oh, there's a woman. I'll make her my girlfriend.
Raj: Whoa, whoa. Walking up to a strange woman in a bar usually doesn't work.
Sheldon: You're forgetting something. Ladies love jocks.
Raj: How many sips of that beer did he have?
Leonard: Three.
Howard: Oh, boy.
Quote from the episode The Perspiration Implementation
Raj: My name is Little Orphan Annie. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Howard: My name is Darth Vader. I am your father. Prepare to die.
Quote from the episode The Perspiration Implementation
Howard: My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
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