Quotes from ‘The Gyroscopic Collapse’
The Gyroscopic Collapse Howard, Leonard and Sheldon celebrate the end of their top secret Air Force project, but their happiness is short-lived. Meanwhile, Amy is offered a visiting researcher position at Princeton for the summer, but she's not sure whether to take the job. |
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: And just remember, I am proud of you and I support you in all that you do.
Amy: Thank you. That means a lot.
Sheldon: Oh, and one last thing. If you find yourself working with a male scientist who's as smart as me, as tall as me and has hair like Thor, well, then I want you to step away from the situation and call me immediately.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Leonard pointed out to me that I'm not always a loving and supportive boyfriend, so here's some quality luggage.
Amy: Thank you.
Sheldon: The salesman said it could survive a plane crash, so perhaps you should fly inside it.
Quote from Penny
Leonard: Should we give them their privacy?
Penny: I want to, but I don't think I can.
Sheldon: (from across the hall) Whoopee!
Penny: Okay, I'm good now.
Quote from Raj
Raj: I really can't thank you enough for taking me in. You know, I was in a pretty low place in my life, and-
Sheldon: (from across the hall) Oh, Amy, you naughty vixen.
Raj: Anyway, uh, as I was saying, I was at a pretty low place in my life and, uh, if it wasn't for friends like you-
Amy: (from across the hall) My goodness, that form of stimulation is highly efficient.
Raj: I can't compete with that.
Quote from Sheldon
Howard: Well, why would you do that?
Colonel Williams: You guys completed phase one, we'll take it from here.
Sheldon: Where did you move it?
Colonel Williams: I can't tell you that.
Leonard: Are you implementing phase two?
Colonel Williams: I can't tell you that.
Sheldon: Wait, so you're just going to take all the work we've done for the last year and toss us aside?
Colonel Williams: That one I can tell you, yes.
Howard: This is all very upsetting.
Colonel Williams: I'm sorry to hear that. As you know, the primary focus of the United States military is people's feelings.
Sheldon: If that's sarcasm, please save it for our enemies.
Quote from Sheldon
Amy: Do you think it's possible you might enjoy being on your own for a little while?
Sheldon: It's hard to say. I've never really lived by myself. What if I become strange and eccentric?
Amy: I'll love you no matter what.
Sheldon: Howard Hughes saved his urine in milk bottles.
Amy: We'll cross that bridge when we come to it.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: All right, then. Let's go to the bedroom, remove our clothes, fold them neatly, and engage in frenzied lovemaking.
Amy: What if we don't fold our clothes at all.
Sheldon: I d- ... or what if we fold them?
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: Uh, I know it's not your birthday, but if you're interested-
Amy: I am.
Sheldon: Okay. Oh, and just to be clear, I'm not being intimate with you in order to keep you from going.
Amy: I wasn't thinking that.
Sheldon: Well, no, it's just, I'm just warning you, you know, if you find yourself 3,000 miles away and craving a hit of this, you know I can't Skype it to you.
Amy: That's a risk I'm willing to take.
Sheldon: All right, then.
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: First thing tomorrow morning, we're back at it.
Raj: Without me.
Sheldon: I hope his character doesn't make it into the movie; he's kind of a bummer.
Quote from Amy
Amy: You know, what you need to do is put this Air Force project behind you and just dive into something new.
Sheldon: Well, there is our quantum cognition experiment. You and I could spend more time on that.
Amy: Oh, I don't know, I mean, let's say we succeed in proving that our consciousness creates reality.
I mean, what will we have really accomplished? You know, a loaf of bread's still three bucks.
Quote from Sheldon
Amy: I was offered a summer research fellowship at Princeton.
Sheldon: Princeton? A fine institution. The place where Albert Einstein taught. And where Leonard got his PhD, so it may have gone downhill.
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: What are you doing?
Sheldon: What does it look like? I'm playing sad harmonica in an apartment as empty as my heart.
Raj: Why?
Sheldon: I got the blues. My baby done left me.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I may have lost my guidance system and my girlfriend, but I still have a colon full of yesterday's meals to keep me company. Although, thanks to your high-fiber breakfast, I'm sure that'll be leaving me, too.
Quote from Penny
Penny: So, did you tell him about Princeton yet?
Amy: No, I'm waiting till he's in a good mood.
Penny: Oh, sweetie, you might not live that long.
Quote from Penny
Penny: Okay, listen to me. Your relationship can handle being long distance for a while. It's not like you two are very physical.
Amy: Hey, you don't know what goes on behind closed doors.
Penny: A lot of lectures?
Amy: All right, so you know.
Quote from Bernadette
Bernadette: Well, distance might be nice. The last time a big project ended for Howie, he wouldn't stop following me around. He even went with me to get a mammogram.
Penny: Well, what's wrong with that?
Bernadette: No, he wanted to get one with me, like some kind of weird couple's massage.
Penny: And yet you bore his child. Neato.
Quote from Penny
Bernadette: You're still gonna go, right?
Amy: I don't know. Sheldon's so vulnerable right now.
Penny: Oh, come on. Look, if the roles were reversed, he'd be on the first train to New Jersey. Or the second train if there were teenagers on the first one.
Quote from Sheldon
Leonard: Sheldon, you're being silly.
Sheldon: Am I? Yesterday I had an Air Force project, a girlfriend who lived with me, and my good friend Raj right across the hall.
Leonard: Do you really care about that last one?
Sheldon: No, but that list was sounding a little thin.
Quote from Bernadette
Bernadette: I don't know if you realize this, but whenever you're between projects, you tend to get a little insecure.
Howard: Oh.
Bernadette: A little clingy.
Howard: I know and I'm sorry. (starts kissing her)
Bernadette: Oh, oh, oh, okay, stop. Stop. I love when you're affectionate, but this is not coming from a good place.
Howard: (laughing) Well, excuse me, but what did you do when you worked on that allergy drug for two years and the FDA shut down your project?
Bernadette: I signed us up for ballroom dance class.
Howard: Okay, and what did you do when they took you off the anti-fungal team?
Bernadette: I made us have a baby.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: You're so kind. You know, I don't know how I ever got by without you.
Amy: Oh. That's sweet, but you you did just fine on your own.
Sheldon: Well, I thought that, too, but I've come to realize, I am completely dependent on you.
Amy: Sheldon, you're, you're being silly.
Sheldon: No, to wake up every morning and know you're there is a great comfort to me. (Eats oatmeal) Mmm, tasteless. How do you do it?
Quote from Howard
Bernadette: Want me to put on some Neil Diamond? That always makes you feel better.
Howard: No. You'll get all sexed up, and I'm not in the mood.
Quote from Howard
Bernadette: So what happens next?
Howard: Phase two: we test it, perfect it, and hope to live long enough to see the movie based on our lives starring more attractive versions of us.
Quote from Howard
Howard: I mean, an entire year wasted.
Bernadette: You might be forgetting another accomplishment of the past year.
Howard: Oh. Yeah, yeah, we brought life into the world.
Bernadette: Really? That's the importance you put on us having a baby?
Howard: I'm happy about it, but, I mean, it's not like I did much. I mean, after the first three minutes it was pretty much all you.
Quote from Leonard
Sheldon: The Air Force did it again. They're erasing our lives!
Leonard: Third floor, wrong apartment.
Howard: Although, if anyone's gonna clean out your apartment and disappear, it'd be Penny.
Leonard: She might disappear, but she's definitely not cleaning anything.
Quote from Sheldon
Howard: How can you work on something for a year and they just take it?
Leonard: I can't believe the Air Force would treat us like that.
Sheldon: You know, I have a good mind to stop paying my taxes. It's too bad I enjoy doing them so much.
Quote from Penny
Raj: Well, I may be moving out soon. I think I found a place to live.
Penny: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Raj: Really? You kept sending me apartment listings.
Penny: Um, well, I- Yeah, you got me.
Leonard: Sir, I-I-I'm sorry but I just don't get it. You came into our lab in the middle of the night and took our prototype and all of our research and didn't even tell us?
Colonel Williams: Sounds like you get it.
Quote from Howard
Leonard: Now, before we field test, I think we --
Howard: What the hell?
Leonard: Where is everything?
Sheldon: Who else has access to this room?
Leonard: It's a secure lab in a classified facility; only the U.S. government and us.
Sheldon: This is very disconcerting.
Howard: But the movie did just get good.
Quote from Leonard
Iris scanner: Leonard Hofstadter. Access granted.
Leonard: Hmm. I don't care if this thing's burning out my retinas; it makes me feel special.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I feel so betrayed. You know, all my life I thought Uncle Sam was a friendly uncle who brought you presents. Turns out he's the other kind.
Quote from Leonard
Leonard: So, are you excited to have your own place again?
Raj: I am, but I'll miss you guys.
Leonard: Ah, we'll miss you, too.
Raj: Well, you could try saying that without smiling.
Leonard: I'm trying. This is the best I can do.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: And don't forget to Skype me when you arrive.
Amy: I won't.
Sheldon: And every morning.
Amy: Got it.
Sheldon: Now of course, my 9:00 a.m. is your noon, so let's avoid the whole "good morning," "good afternoon" minefield, and let's just say, "Hello."
Amy: Good thinking.
Quote from Amy
Sheldon: And you'll text me when you arrive at the airport?
Amy: I will.
Sheldon: And when you're at the gate?
Amy: Uh-huh.
Sheldon: And if you see any actors from Game of Thrones in first class?
Amy: I don't know what they look like, but sure.
Quote from Sheldon
Sheldon: I've been doing a little research on New Jersey, and I was delighted to learn that their chief agricultural product is sod.
Amy: Is it?
Sheldon: Hmm, yes. Yeah, perhaps I've been harder on them than they deserve.
Quote from Sheldon
Penny: Champagne, champagne, and for the world's tallest second grader, apple juice.
Sheldon: No bendy straw? Some party.
Quote from Penny
Penny: Oh come on, he's a grown man. He can take care of himself.
Amy: You really believe that?
Penny: Once again, you got me.
Quote from Sheldon
Amy: You know, it's nice of you to acknowledge us, but this is your accomplishment.
Bernadette: Yeah, you guys did this all on your own.
Raj: Without me.
Sheldon: To success without Raj!
Quote from Sheldon
Amy: Does this mean you're okay with me going?
Sheldon: Well, I'm not looking forward to it, but it is a wonderful opportunity and you need to take it. Besides, Princeton is in New Jersey, so it's not like you're gonna want to stay.
Quote from Penny
Amy: I don't know, maybe I shouldn't go.
Penny: Oh, stop it, he'll be fine.
Amy: I guess. And he'll have you and Leonard right across the hall the whole time.
Penny: Oh, damn, wait, you know, maybe you shouldn't go-
Amy: Got to go! (Hangs up the phone)
Quote from Penny
Bernadette: You're excited about this opportunity, right?
Amy: Of course. I get to be part of the first team to use radon markers to map the structures that-
Penny: Okay, a simple yes will do.
Quote from Raj
Raj: Bert has a room for rent.
Bernadette: So you're gonna be roommates with Bert?
Raj: Uh, no, it's, uh, pretty private, actually, it's over his garage. So the only time I'll see him is when he pulls his car in, does his laundry or practices drums in my dining room.
Quote from Penny
Amy: Well, good for you. Mm-hmm. I actually have a little news myself.
Penny: Okay, we're just gonna circle back to when he's moving out? Okay, that's cool.
Quote from Amy
Bernadette: Really? He doesn't put raisins or banana slices or anything in it?
Amy: I don't think plain oatmeal was the point of that story.
Penny: I mean, I like a little brown sugar-
Amy: Guys!
Quote from Amy
Amy: Morning.
Sheldon: I apologize for exceeding my allotted bathroom time.
Amy: Are you feeling okay?
Sheldon: Not really. Apparently grief can make one less regular.
Amy: Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Sheldon: No, I sat and I sat, but to no avail.
Amy: Oh, the-the more details, the more sorry.