Sheldon: You know what they say, fool me "N" times, where "N" equals the amount of times you've already fooled me, shame on you. Fool me "N" plus one times, shame on me.

Penny: I'm not leaving you for Bill Gates.
Leonard: You sure? I bet his Internet's really fast.

Leonard: Uh, M-Mr. Gates, I'm-I'm Dr. Leonard Hofstadter. We've actually met before.
Bill Gates : Sorry, I don't remember.
Leonard: You were so nice, a-and it was really special to me because you've been such a big influence on my life. I mean, ever since I was a little kid, I've looked up to you like-like a hero. (sobbing)
Bill Gates : Oh, now I remember. Would you like a tissue?
Leonard: How about a hug?
Bill Gates : How-how about a tissue?

Raj: But why do they still call Batman using the Bat-Signal? Wouldn't it just be, like, easier to text him?
Howard: The Bat-Signal isn't just to alert Batman, it's also to strike fear in the hearts of his enemies and let them know he's coming.
Leonard: Sort of like Sheldon's knock.
Sheldon: Comparing me to Batman? I'll take it.

Amy: So, what are we watching?
Bernadette: Bob the Builder. I'll catch you up. That one's Bob. He's a builder.
Amy: Isn't this a kids show?
Bernadette: It's what we watch in this house. Bob the Builder, Dinosaur Train, and Peppa Pig, which is both funny and meaningful.

Amy: If we don't do anything, how long do you think they'll talk about Batman?
Penny: Well, I've know them for 11 years, so 11 years.

Penny: All right, I'm putting a stop to this.
Bernadette: If you knew how, why'd you wait 11 years?

Leonard: Actually, I've-I've already met him once before. He gave a talk at Princeton and my mom took me.
Penny: Oh, really? Was he nice?
Leonard: He's super nice. I-I got pretty emotional and started crying and he didn't make fun of me or anything.
Penny: Well, you were a kid.
Leonard: ... Uh-huh.

Penny: Wait, why are you being so weird?
Sheldon: It occurred to me that perhaps you were telling the truth about Bill Gates and it wasn't just part of an elaborate prank.
Penny: What would the prank part even be?
Sheldon: I show up to meet Bill Gates over your "objections," but it's not Bill Gates at all, no. It's one of those look-alikes that you hire for a party. And then when I go around showing everybody the balloon animal that "Bill Gates" made for me, I'll look like an idiot.
Penny: Have you been eating laundry detergent?

Howard: Do you think you could get Bill Gates to sign something for me?
Penny: Yeah, maybe, like what?
Howard: Oh, my arm, my chest, his call.
Penny: His call will be to the police.

Raj: What would you do if you had a billion dollars?
Howard: Same as Bill Gates, try to make the world a better place, but I'd do it in a working Iron Man suit.
Raj: I didn't know that came in a boys' medium.

Bernadette: Sorry I talked about my kids the whole time.
Amy: Oh, don't worry about it. I mean, besides you cutting up my meat for me, it was a lovely lunch.

Amy: Well, these are positive changes. Studies with rats show that new mothers are more sensitive to danger, better at multitasking and bolder in the pursuit of food.
Bernadette: I did stick a couple lamp chops in my purse.
Amy: So that's what I was smelling.

Amy: Look, even though your brain is different, in many ways, it's better.
Bernadette: But were you bored?
Amy: Of course not.
Bernadette: You're lying.
Amy: Which you can tell, because your maternal brain is better at sensing nonverbal cues.
Bernadette: Now you're just being condescending.
Amy: Look at you, two for two.

Penny: Hey, where you been?
Leonard: Uh, just hanging out with the guys.
Penny: They still mad at me?
Leonard: Uh, they were, but then I was like, "Hey," and they were like, "What?" and I was like, "You know," and they were like, "Okay."
Penny: You're a good husband.
Leonard: Well, it's not for me to say, but you just said it, so you're probably right.