Quotes from ‘The Robotic Manipulation’

The Robotic Manipulation

The Robotic Manipulation - Season 4, Episode 1
Aired September 23, 2010.

When Penny urges Sheldon to go on his first date, she finds herself dragged along to watch. Meanwhile, Howard finds himself in an uncomfortable position when he discovers a new use for a robotic arm.

Quote from Althea

Althea: What is this?
Howard: It's a robot arm.
Althea: Where's the rest of the robot?
Howard: I only built the arm.
Althea: Because that's all you needed, right?

Quote from Raj

Leonard: I'd suggest using some lubricant, but I have a feeling you fell on that as well.
Howard: Not funny, Leonard.
Raj: Oh, come on, dude. A robot hand's got a death grip on your junk. It's funny. Ask anyone.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I am aware of the way humans usually reproduce which is messy, unsanitary and based on living next to you for three years, involves loud and unnecessary appeals to a deity.
Penny: Oh, God.
Sheldon: Yes, exactly.

Quote from Leonard

Raj: When Winnie-the-Pooh got his head stuck in the honey tree, his friends all grabbed onto him and pulled and pulled.
Leonard: You do what you want, I'm not touching another man's honey tree.

Quote from Howard

Wolowitz: Winnie-the-Pooh is out of the honey tree.

Quote from Raj

Rajesh: You know there's something I've always wondered about Aquaman
Leonard: Yeah?
Rajesh: Where does he poop?
Leonard: What?
Rajesh: What do the toilet look like in Atlantis? How would you flush it? And when you did flush it, where would the poop go?

Quote from Raj

Raj: You slipped and fell into a robotic hand.
Wolowitz: Yes.
Raj: Penis first?
Wolowitz: Yes.

Quote from Howard

Raj: How about we get an electric saw and cut it off?
Howard: What? No saws. One circumcision was enough.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Sheldon, have you ever told Amy what it was like for you growing up in Texas?
Sheldon: No.
Penny: Well, why don't you tell her?
Sheldon: All right. It was hell.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Well that's no threat, my mother's always wanted a grandchild.
Penny: Really? Your deeply religious born-again Christian mother wants a test-tube grandbaby born out of wedlock?
Sheldon: Curses.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: The robot hand got stuck on your what?

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Well, my question is, and I'm pretty sure I know the answer, is this your first date?
Sheldon: That depends. Does square-dancing with my sister at a Teens for Jesus 4th of July Hoe-down count as a date?
Penny: No.
Sheldon: Then, this is my first date.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Can I ask you a question?
Sheldon: Given your community-college education, I encourage you to ask me as many as possible.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I decided to take your advice and have arranged to go on a date with Amy Farrah Fowler.
Penny: Oh, that's great. Have fun.
Sheldon: Wait, you have to drive me.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: You know I don't drive.
Penny: Well, go ask Leonard.
Sheldon: I did; he said, and I quote: "Ask Penny, it was her cockamamie idea."
Penny: Leonard said "cockamamie"?
Sheldon: Actually, I'm paraphrasing. Having been raised in a Christian household, I'm uncomfortable with the language he used. And to be honest, I'm not entirely comfortable with "cockamamie".

Quote from Raj

Howard's mom: Howard, I made cookies for you and your little friends.
Howard: That's great, mom. Thanks.
Howard's mom: I'll bring them up with some Hawaiian Punch.
Howard: *startled* Don't come up here!
Howard's mom: Why not? Are you ashamed of your mother?
Howard: Yes, but that's not the point. Get me out of here!
Leonard: Do you have any ideas, Raj?
Raj: Right now all I can think about is cookies and Hawaiian Punch.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Impressive, but we must be cautious.
Howard: Why?
Sheldon: Today, it's a Chinese-food-retrieval robot. Tomorrow, it travels back in time and kills Sarah Connor.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I have a Masters degree and two Doctorates. The things I should know, I do know.

Quote from Althea

Howard: Can you please just help me?
Althea: All right, all right. Hang on, stay calm. (Over the PA system) I need an orderly with a wheelchair. I got a robot hand grasping a man's penis out here.
Howard: You think you could be a little more discreet?
Althea: I'm sorry. We don't have a code for robot hand grasping a man's penis.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Is your womb available for rental?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I just don't want to be yet another flip-flop fatality.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: So, this conversation is as pointless as your door knocking soliloquy?
Penny: Let me get my cockamamie keys.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: What do you mean it happened again?!

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: That's amazing.
Sheldon: I wouldn't say amazing. At best it's a modest leap forward from the basic technology that gave us Country Bear Jamboree.
Howard: Hey, Sheldon? Ahem.
Sheldon: Yes?
*Howard commands the robot arm to perform a hand gesture*
Sheldon: Peace?
Howard: No, not peace. Hang on.

Quote from Amy

Amy Farrah Fowler (text message): I don't care for perchloroethylene, and I don't like glycol ether.

Quote from Althea

Althea: My, my, my. What do we have here?
Howard: I slipped and fell.
Althea: Yeah, we get that a lot.

Quote from Howard

Leonard: You slipped and fell into a robot hand?
Wolowitz: Yes
Raj: Penis first?
Wolowitz: Yes!

Quote from Howard

Althea: Why is it hooked up to a computer?
Leonard: Uh, it's what controls the arm.
Howard: But it's frozen.
Althea: Did you try turning it off and back on again?
Howard: No, you see, it's more complicated than that. (Althea switches off computer) No, wait! (The robot hand lets go) Winnie the Pooh is out of the honey tree.