Quotes from ‘The Cooper/Kripke Inversion’

The Cooper/Kripke Inversion

The Cooper/Kripke Inversion
Season 6, Episode 14 - Aired January 31, 2013

When Sheldon is forced to work with Barry Kripke, he is surprised to find his work is not as good as Barry's. Meanwhile, Howard and Raj spend $1,000 on action figures of themselves.

Quote from Sheldon

Kripke: My work would suffer too if I was getting laid all the time.
Sheldon: Yes, that is the reason. My work is suffering because of all the laid I am getting.
Kripke: You lucky bastard.
Sheldon: What can I say, you know? She enjoys my genitals. I am giving them to her on a nightly basis.

Quote from Sheldon

Kripke: You guys ever use any toys?
Sheldon: I do have a model rocket next to my bed.
Kripke: A rocket? You're a freak! I love it!

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: No, here's how love works. You're gonna return the machine or you can print out a working set of lady parts and sleep with those.
Howard: [pondering]
Bernadette: Oh, my God! Are you actually thinking about it?

Quote from Howard

Howard: My wife came with both fun bags and money bags.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Penny, all my life I have been uncomfortable with the sort of physical contact that comes easily to others: handshaking, hugging, prostate exams. But I'm working on it, you know? Just recently, I had to put VapoRub on Amy's chest. A year ago, that would have been unthinkable.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: Okay. Hang on. Are you saying some day that you and Amy might actually get physical?
Sheldon: It's a possibility.

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: $5,000 for a couple dolls. Are you out of your mind?

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Well, the equation balances, but it's certainly not elegant.
Kripke: Whatever. Did you get any last night?
Sheldon: Yes.
Kripke: Gave it to her good, huh?
Sheldon: No, I gave it to her well.

Quote from Howard

Raj: Aren't you gonna to eat lunch?
Howard: Nah, I blew my food allowance on Pokemon cards.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: Is my coitus whimsically inventive?
Penny: That is what I write on the bathroom walls. For a whimsically inventive time, call Leonard Hofstadter.
Leonard: I know you're joking, but I'd be okay with that.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Maybe it's a shipping problem.
Howard: What?
Leonard: Maybe Wesley Snipes and Toucan Sam just got action figures that look like you guys.

Quote from Howard

Raj: Oh, okay, great. Now, I can look like Val Kilmer as Batman, instead of Val Kilmer as he looks today.
Howard: All right, you can suck it in a little bit.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: A hush falls over the crowd as Cooper studies the board. He makes his move. He's dividing both sides by I. He's adding back the coefficient. He has a value for P. He's plugging that back in. He takes the derivative, and he solves the equation. The crowd goes wild. Nobel! Nobel!

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: That's ridiculous. I am one of the great minds of our generation. I work on a level so rarefied you couldn't even imagine it. I said stop looking at my train!

Quote from Raj

Raj: Oh, I'm not dark chocolate. I'm melt-in-your-mouth caramel.

Quote from Leonard

Howard: I can't believe I wasted all that money.
Leonard: Aw, and my girlfriend wouldn't let me get one. Look at my face. Do I look smug? I feel smug.

Quote from Sheldon

Kripke: You have some brilliant insights here, but if we're gonna make this work, you need to buckle down and focus.
Sheldon: I'll do what I can. But it's not going to be easy, because when I'm with Amy and our bathing suit areas mush together, boy howdy, is it magic.

Quote from Bernadette

Bernadette: That's so cute. I didn't think there could be a smaller version of you.

Quote from Sheldon

Penny: All right, I don't understand. Why didn't you just tell Kripke the truth?
Sheldon: Because the truth made my look bad, whereas a ridiculous bald-faced lie makes me look good. Anyway, if Kripke asks, tell him my coitus with Amy is frequent, intense and whimsically inventive.

Quote from Sheldon

Kripke: Was she naked or was she wearing lingerie?
Sheldon: I didn't notice.
Kripke: How could you not notice?
Sheldon: i was too busy squishing all the desirable parts of her body.
Kripke: Ah, you're killing me, Cooper!

Quote from Sheldon

Kripke: You guys ever use any toys?
Sheldon: Toys? I do have a model rocket next to my bed.
Kripke: A rocket? You're a freak! I love it!

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm not interested in being published in Mad Magazine. Zingers fly fast in the Thunderdome, Barry.