Howard: Everything okay?
Raj: Yeah, it's just Anu's doorbell camera. I helped her install it.
Bernadette: You can't look at it. That's spying.
Raj: Who the hell is this guy?
Bernadette: Ooh, let me see.

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?

Bernadette: (Shouting from the bathroom) How many times do I have to tell you to replace the toilet paper when it's empty?
Howard: I'm in the middle of something.
Bernadette: So am I!

Leonard: You don't go into science for the money.
Bernadette: Speak for yourself. Last month my company both invented and cured restless eye syndrome. Ka-ching, ya blinky chumps!

Stuart: Would you mind stocking these?
Denise: Actually, I'm not on the clock today. I'm just hanging out with my boyfriend.
Stuart: Ah, cool. Huh. That's me, right?
Denise: Oh, I forgot to tell you, I broke up with you, and now I'm dating that guy.
Stuart: I know you're joking, but my flight-or-flight response doesn't.
Denise: Isn't it fight-or-flight?
Stuart: Not for me.

President Siebert: Well, this is nice. Why have we waited so long to do this?
Sheldon: Because you never invited us.
President Siebert: Ha-ha-ha! Well, the important thing is you're here now, and we're so excited about your work. This paper's going to do big things for all of us, so if there's anything that you need You know, actually, I could use some barbecue sauce for my tots. Oh, wait. No. Ketchup.
President Siebert: Can we have some barbecue sauce and ketchup over here?
Sheldon: Both? So this is how the other half lives.

Sheldon: Now, wait, wait, are you trying to exclude me?
President Siebert: Look, Sheldon, you're a brilliant man, but your people skills are-
Sheldon: This is not barbecue sauce! This is steak sauce! What are you trying to pull?
President Siebert: Like that.
Sheldon: This is ridiculous. It is my work, too, and I am perfectly capable of keeping it together for an interview.
President Siebert: Okay. Say somebody asks if you feel your work is derivative of the work of Professor Joseph Polchinski.
[Sheldon's face starts twitching violently]
Amy: Seriously, can we get this man some barbecue sauce!?