Raj: Sheldon, super-asymmetry is your paper. Everyone knows you were there first.
Leonard: Mm, actually, the Nobel Committee has sometimes favored experimentalists like them over theoreticians like you.
Sheldon: No, that's just a scary campfire story like the guy with the hook.

Raj: I don't like bugs, okay. They freak me out.
Sheldon: Interesting. You're afraid of insects and women. Ladybugs must render you catatonic.

Sheldon: Scissors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes scissors, scissors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes scissors.

Sheldon: Why are you crying?
Penny: Because I'm stupid.
Sheldon: That's no reason to cry. One cries because one is sad. For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.

Bernadette: Penny, everybody feels like you do. Like they're not good enough, not smart enough.
Penny: What, even you?
Bernadette: Of course.
Jess: Dr. Rostenkowski, you wanted me-
Bernadette: Hey, did they not teach knocking at Stanford? Get out! (chuckles) I love that kid.

Bernadette: Why don't you want to work with me? I know I can be tough, but that's just 'cause I'm surrounded by useless idiots.

Penny: No, it's not that.
Bernadette: Then why?
Penny: Honestly, I don't know if I'm up to it. You know, the last project I managed was my high school yearbook.
Bernadette: And?
Penny: And that was the year we didn't have one. - And? And that was the year we didn't have one. Apparently, the printers won't make them without getting paid.
Bernadette: What happened to the money?
Penny: Uh, if I didn't know then, I'm not going to magically know now.