Bernadette: Anyway, it'll be a nice surprise for the boys. And Howie doesn't think I take his interests seriously, so hopefully this will keep him fooled for a while.

Bernadette: You better find my husband's mother, 'cause one way or another we're walking out of this airport with a dead woman.

Howard: I'm sorry I didn't take you to the airport. I just want you to know I'll never forgive myself for being so selfish. And I promise to keep you close for the rest of my life.
Bernadette: Oh, no, that thing's gonna end up in my bedroom.

Bernadette: Gosh, Amy. I'm sensing a little hostility. Is it maybe because like Sheldon's work, your sex life is also theoretical?

Amy: I guess it must have been back when I was in the Girl Sprouts.
Bernadette: Girl Sprouts?
Amy: My mom made it up as an alternative to the Girl Scouts. She didn't want me selling cookies on some street corner like a whore.

Sheldon: I know why. You've come to me because you're my Obi-Wan.
Arthur: I'm not familiar with that. Is that an Internet?

Penny: Oh, I get it. Like C-3PO. ... What happened to me?