Mrs. Wolowitz Howard, I found my girdle. It was in the dryer.
Howard: That's great, ma.
Mrs. Wolowitz I think it shrunk. I'm spilling out like the Pillsbury Doughboy here.

Mrs. Wolowitz: Howard, help, my hand's stuck in the garbage disposal.
Howard: Let go of whatever piece of food you're holding.
Mrs. Wolowitz: Are you kidding? It's a perfectly good chicken leg.

Mrs. Wolowitz Howard, are you having a playdate?
Howard: I don't have playdates. I have colleagues.
Mrs. Wolowitz Do their parents know they're here?
Howard: No, but if you keep screaming, maybe they'll hear you.

Mrs. Wolowitz Should I ask Leonard to bring over your homework?
Howard: I don't have homework. I'm a grown man with a master's degree in engineering.
Mrs. Wolowitz Excuse me, Mr. Fancy Pants. Want me to get you a popsicle?

Leonard: Sometimes your movements are so lifelike I forget you are not a real boy.

Raj: Oh, you're so arrogant. If you were a super hero your name would be Captain Arrogant. And do you know what your super power would be? Arrogance.

Sheldon: Oh, Penny. Penny.
Penny: What's up?
Sheldon: Nothing. I just wanted to make Raj stop talking.