Howard: It's all defrosting.
Bernadette: It's okay, it's just food.
Howard: It's not just food. This is the last food my mother ever made. This is her last brisket. This is her last meatloaf. This is her last - I have no idea what this is. But, it's the last one.

Howard: You know, I'm really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.
Sheldon: Why?
Howard: Once you're fluent, you'll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me.

Josh: So, I have to ask, was the robot sexy?
Howard: It was actually just a mechanical hand.
Josh: 'Cause that's all you need, right?
Howard: You are my brother.

Sheldon: Sheldon Cooper does not cry.
Howard: That's true, you'd rust.

Penny: I mean, who even reads Scientific American?
Leonard: It's kind of a big deal.
Penny: If it's such a big deal, how come the biggest celebrity they could get for the cover is a molecule?

Sheldon: Is it my fault I have a much bigger reputation than he does?
Amy: It's not your fault.
Sheldon: Is it my fault that my name came first on the paper alphabetically?
Amy: Not your fault.
Sheldon: Is it my fault that when the reporter cited me as the lead scientist, I didn't correct him?
Amy: Hey look at that pretty bird.

Howard: All Ma's food is going to be ruined.
Bernadette: Why don't we take it home and put it on our freezer?
Raj: You don't want to do that. Refreezing not only removes moisture, but it creates ice crystals in the fibres of the meat that can compromise its taste and texture. What? I saw a teachable moment. I dropped some culinary science.