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Beverly Hofstadter Quotes Page 2 of 6

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Quote from the episode The VCR Illumination

Beverly Hofstadter: Penny, go on.
Penny: Well, ever since his paper got disproven, he's been a wreck. He's been sad and and angry. He just seems kind of broken.
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, it sounds like he may be grieving.
Penny: Really? Over a theory?
Beverly Hofstadter: Of course. You can grieve over any emotional loss. The more you care about something, the greater the trauma of losing it.
Leonard: Oh, boy. He cared about this a lot.
Penny: Yeah. What can we do to help him?
Beverly Hofstadter: Well, grieving is a process. Every culture has its own rituals and traditions to facilitate mourning. The ancient Egyptians had their mummification, the Tibetans had their sky funerals-
Leonard: And when I was little and my dog died, my mom sat me down and very gently told me that she wished the truck had hit my dad instead.
Beverly Hofstadter: I was trying to lighten the mood. Your dog had just died.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Penny: It's out of order.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, I can read the sign. I was just pondering the implications.
Penny: I think it implies that the elevator doesn't work.
Beverly Hofstadter: Again, I can read the sign. But the sign and the tape are covered with a layer of dust which indicates the elevator has been non-functional for a significant period of time, which suggests either a remarkable passivity among the - I assume - 24-36 residents of this building - based on the number of mail boxes and typical urban densities - or a shared delusion of functionality.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Your check engine light is on.
Penny: Yeah, I gotta put a sticker over that. So, you must be devastated about your divorce?
Beverly Hofstadter: Oh, not at all. Though I am a bit distressed to be a in vehicle that's not subjected to regular maintenance.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Well, initially I felt something akin to grief and perhaps anger, but that's the natural reaction of the limbic system to being betrayed by a loathsome son of a bitch.

Quote from the episode The Line Substitution Solution

Beverly: Your relationship with him is fascinating. I'm preparing to write a book on high-achieving couples, and I would love to interview the both of you.
Amy: Oh, sure. I'll talk to Sheldon about it. You know, Bernadette's husband is a former astronaut.
Beverly: Really? Do you think he would be interested in being interviewed as well?
Bernadette: Do I think he'd be interested? Sometimes I hear him pretending to be interviewed when he's alone in the bathroom.
Beverly: Wonderful. I'll give you my contact information.
Bernadette: Um, you should probably talk to Penny, too.
Beverly: About what?

Quote from the episode The Convergence Convergence

Penny: Whew, chilly.
Amy: I think I can see my breath.
Beverly Hofstadter: We can hear you.
Penny: Sorry.
Amy: Sorry.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Combustion

Leonard: She's just a very sweet and God-fearing lady, and you have to be respectful of her beliefs.
Beverly Hofstadter: Leonard, I am an adult. I know how to conduct myself around people from different walks of life.
Leonard: Thank you.
Beverly Hofstadter: Where is she from again?
Leonard: East Texas.
Beverly Hofstadter: Ugh.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: You know, both selective mutism and an inability to separate from one's mother can stem from a pathological fear of women. It might explain why the two of you have created an ersatz homosexual marriage to satisfy your need for intimacy.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Capacitance

Beverly Hofstadter: Your scan data will be very helpful to my research. You have a remarkable brain.
Sheldon: I know. Although, I've always hated how my right frontal lobe looks in pictures.
Beverly Hofstadter: Common complaint among men. Nothing's ever big enough. Except when they get a tumor, Then you never hear the end of it.

Quote from the episode The Escape Hatch Identification

Amy: This isn't about me and Sheldon. This is about Rajesh moving in with Leonard and Penny.
Beverly Hofstadter: Interesting. They've found a need to take yet another roommate. Seems they're avoiding some harsh realities themselves.
Sheldon: I had no idea all our relationships were such a disaster. Boy, you're good.
Beverly Hofstadter: That is the word on the street, dear.

Quote from the episode The Celebration Experimentation

Beverly Hofstadter: Sheldon, I know the future holds great things for you, and we all can't wait to see what they are. Happy birthday, dear.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: It's all right, Sheldon. I will just pretend Leonard's not withholding information. Although, I will point out, Leonard, that I am a trained psychiatrist and you are exhibiting the same secretive behavioral ticks that accompanied you learning to masturbate.

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Speaking of fathers, Leonard, I'm divorcing yours.
Leonard: What?
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes, he was cheating on me.
Leonard: No.
Beverly Hofstadter: Yes. With some waitress from the university cafeteria. Can you believe it? A waitress! Oh, no offense dear!

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: Excuse me, Leonard. I'm the one getting a divorce, Mitsy's dead, why are you the one making a fuss?

Quote from the episode The Maternal Congruence

Beverly Hofstadter: I've been responsible for my own orgasms since 1982.
Penny: Yikes.
Beverly Hofstadter: *laughs*
Penny: What's so funny?
Beverly Hofstadter: That's exactly what I say during orgasms: "yikes".

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