Sheldon: Alright, Klingons, pencils down.

Sheldon: You are soft. The world is going to chew you up and spit you out.

Sheldon: Now, back to our game.
Raj: You were in the middle of an erection.
Sheldon: Oh, of course. It's right here in my hand.

Sheldon: This place could really use a suggestion box.

Sheldon: Action.
Penny: Okay, it's not a movie. It's improv. So no one calls action.
Sheldon: Hey, you taught me something. Who would have thought that.

Raj: Anyway, if it's okay with you, we should talk about Howard's bachelor party.
Sheldon: Well, seems like a bit of a let down after our lichen conversation, but, what do you know, youre half swan.

Sheldon: Then I suggest you get them down with a long stick and play panty piata.

Sheldon: Ooh, now that is a treat that's hard to beat. Get the Mad Hatter on the horn. I'm having a tea party!

Sheldon: *knock knock knock* Amy.
*knock knock knock* Amy
*knock knock knock* Angry Amy.

Sheldon: Eat one of your Luna bars. Very often when women think they're angry, they're really just hungry.

Sheldon: Oh, Leonard, there you are. I need you to check my head for chair lice.
Leonard: I did it last night, I'm not doing it again.
Howard: Just his head, right?
Leonard: I don't want to talk about it. You didn't catch bugs from Penny's chair.
Sheldon: Yes, I did. And now they're cavorting at the base of my hair follicles, like dancing hippies at the Redwood National Forest.
Leonard: Sheldon, you do this all the time. You fixate on some crazy idea and then blow it way out of proportion.
Sheldon: Name one time I have ever done that.
Leonard: How about the time you put GPS trackers in your garbage because you were convinced that North Korean spies were stealing your doodles? The chicken nuggets you were sure were human nuggets. The strangely shaped cloud that was following you around town. The time you put on my shirt by mistake and were convinced that you started growing again.
Sheldon: I said name one. You really need to work on your listening skills.

Raj: And we're blending, and we're blending, and we're done. Sheldon: I know Mr. Data isn't supposed to smile, but here it comes. Howard: (Dressed as a Borg) Come on, guys. Let's do this. Leonard: (dressed as Captain Picard): Yeah, I'm sweating my bald cap off.

Sheldon: (Yelling at a mockingbird) And you, the notes are C, D, E, G and A! You pick one or I'm chopping down that tree!

Sheldon: Okay, stop ruining Valentine's day and order my pizza.

Sheldon: I believe the painful sensation felt after passing a meal of spicy chillies is proof that the rectum does possess the sense of taste.