Sheldon: Oh, and also, I am willing to forgo the bathroom schedule.
Penny: Oh.
Leonard: Really? Why does she get that?! We never got that!
Penny: Do you want him back?
Leonard: I'm very happy for you.

Sheldon: Amy, you should know I was never really interested in seeing other women. And to prove how serious I am about us, I'm willing to take our relationship to the next level.
-Cut to Sheldon and Amy's bathroom in Apartment 4B-
Sheldon: Amy Farrah Fowler, will you share this toothbrush holder with me?
Amy: I would love to.
Leonard: Did we really need to be here for this?
Penny: Call me crazy, but I found it moving.

Penny: Sheldon, she wanted to share a toothbrush holder with you, and now you're at an ice cream parlor trying to pick up women!

Penny: Okay, I'm confused. Which one is Mr. Robot?
Leonard: I'll give you a hint. We're watching Daredevil.

Sheldon: Oh, look who's in favor of compromise, the woman who married Leonard Hofstadter.
Leonard: Hey, she didn't compromise. She settled. There's a difference.
Penny: Yeah, you tell him, babe.

Howard: Well, pulling a quarter out of your ear isn't the only magic these hands can do. In fact, what's this between your toes?
Bernadette: Can you please stop making money come out of me for two minutes?

Sheldon: Will you two please inform Amy how much you enjoy adhering to a strict bathroom schedule?
Penny: Can't.
Leonard: Won't.
Penny: Didn't.
Leonard: Don't.

Amy: You wanna see other people? Go see other people.
Penny: I hope one of those people is a monkey, 'cause this is bananas.
Leonard: Hey, you can make jokes, but if this keeps up, he's gonna move back in here.

Howard: Who's ready for a hot, three-hour car ride to the desert?
Bernadette: Next vomit is gonna be in your lap.
Howard: I'm sorry. We don't have to go.
Bernadette: But it's our last chance to take a vacation that's just the two of us.
Howard: How 'bout we stay here? We don't even have to tell anyone. It'll be like a secret vacation at home.

Bernadette: Keeping secrets from our friends. That does sound kinda fun.
Howard: Does it sound sexy?
Bernadette: You just heard me throwing up.
Howard: You bet I did.
Bernadette: You're so weird.
Howard: You know what's weird? How turned on you are right now.

Howard: Is that the hot tub?
Bernadette: Who would use our hot tub?
Howard: Well, the answer is both more and less disturbing than you think.
Bernadette: Who is it?
Howard: Stuart.

Bernadette: Is it me, or is there something fun about watching him just float there?
Howard: Maybe this is why people get fish tanks.

Raj: What are you doing here?!
Stuart: What are you doing here?!
Raj: Maybe Howard and Bernadette said I could be here!
Stuart: Did they?
Raj: Answer the question! What are you doing here?!

Penny: You know, one night, Leonard's nose whistled so loud, I swear it was like sleeping on a train track.
Sheldon: Have you noticed it's always an A-flat?
Penny: Is it?
*Sheldon whistles*
Penny: Oh! It's like his sinuses are right here in the car.

Sheldon: If we're just going to drive around aimlessly, the least you could do is take me for ice cream.
Penny: Yeah, I'll take you for ice cream.
Sheldon: Well, see, why can't Amy be that subservient? She has coitus one time, suddenly she's Gloria Steinem.