Amy: You hear me say pretzels, you change the subject.
Sheldon: Rhinos are my least favorite animals at the zoo.
Amy: What?
Sheldon: Oh, I'm sorry. I thought we started.

Raj: That's funny. I always thought Howard was nature's way of saying the Wolowitz line ends here.
Howard: Me, too, but life does find a way!

Penny: Hey, if Halley can't reach the liquor cabinet. why did you baby-proof it?
Howard: How did you know we did?
Penny: Fair point.

Stuart: Bernadette still going stir-crazy?
Howard: Oh, a little. Two months of bed rest, it's kind of rough.
Raj: Really? That sounds great. How do I get that?
Leonard: You'd either have to break your hip or let Howard knock you up.
Penny: Now, either way, you'll get flowers the next morning.

Howard: Uh-oh. They gave us plain rice instead of fried rice.
Raj: Well, no fair! I SoulCycled this morning. I'm entitled to a pile of fat rice.

Amy: I see your point. Okay, we are officially open to a best woman and a gentleman of honor.
Sheldon: Oh, those names are terrible. One point off for you.
Amy: What am I being tested for?
Sheldon: Oh, it's not important. But if you don't pass, none of this matters.

Raj: No, no, no, no, no. Uh, Aunt Orange can't sit next to the bar without Ms. Pink saying, "Jesus thinks you've had enough whiskey."

Stuart: Everything okay?
Sheldon: Well, I secretly experimented on my friends, and now none of them want to be my best man. So, you know, normal wedding drama.

Sheldon: Probably have to use my stupid brother. So get ready for a wedding toast delivered by his armpit.

Stuart: Well, if you really don't want to use your brother, I'd be your best man.
Sheldon: Really?
Stuart: Yeah, we're friends. Plus, it'd be nice. Never really been called the best before. Or a man, for that matter.

Howard: You're still working on Sheldon's dumb brain teaser?
Leonard: Oh, my God, Dr. Purple's a woman! Of course! Oh, that feels so good.

Sheldon: Hello. I believe I owe the three of you an apology.
Howard: No argument here.
Sheldon: By experimenting on you, I realize I've violated your trust and possibly the Geneva Convention.

Leonard: Stuart, I'm sorry if it's weird Sheldon made me best man instead of you.
Stuart: It's okay. I was best man for two whole days. No one can take that away from me. Except for Sheldon, when he did.

Sheldon: Although, if you want to be a part of the wedding party, I suppose you could be the flower girl.
Stuart: Sold.
Howard: Well, I thought Halley was gonna be the flower girl.
Sheldon: Oh, that's much better. Sorry, Stuart, you're out.

Penny: Fine, I'll do it. But do me a favor and unlock the liquor cabinet first.