The Big Bang Theory - The Vegas Renormalization Quotes

Sheldon: What exactly does that expression mean, 'friends with benefits?' Does he provide her with health insurance?

Sheldon: You know, I'm given to understand that there's an entire city in Nevada devoted specifically to help people like Howard forget their problems. They replace them with new problems such as alcoholism, gambling addiction and sexually transmitted diseases.

Wolowitz: Raj, there's no place for truth on the Internet.

Leonard: What were you doing at Penny's?
Sheldon: Well, we had dinner, played some games, and then I spent the night. Oh, and you'll be happy to know that I now have a much better understanding of 'friends with benefits.'

Raj: What do you say Howard?
Howard: I say Vegas baby!
Raj: What are you gonna tell your mother?
Howard: Sea World baby!

Sheldon: You know I'm in such a good mood I'm actually finding your tenuous grasp of the English language folksy and charming today.

Raj: Disneyland can suck it. This is the real happiest place on Earth.

Sheldon: Penny.
Penny: What?
Sheldon: I can't sleep.
Penny: Maybe that's because your hole is still open.

Sheldon: Penny.
Penny: Yeah.
Sheldon: Thanks for letting me stay here.
Penny: Oh, you're welcome sweetie.
Sheldon: Okay, I'm sleepy now get out.

Sheldon: There was a tall man from Cornwall
Whose length exceeded his bed.
"My body fits on it
But barely upon it
There's no room for my big Cornish head!"

Raj: She is exactly Howard's type. A hooker.

Hooker: What's your name?
Raj: Rajesh Ramayan Koothrappali.
Hooker: Hello Rajesh Ram...Hello Rajesh.

Sheldon: We have a bowl. Our keys are in the bowl. You shoud get bowl
Penny: I just don't understand; how can beautyful mind of Sheldon Cooper forget his keys in the first place?
Sheldon: I left them in the bowl.