Quotes from ‘The Monopolar Expedition’

The Monopolar Expedition

'The Monopolar Expedition' - Season 2, Episode 23

When Sheldon is offered the opportunity to research at the North Pole, he invites the guys along with him. The impending expedition forces Penny & Leonard to reconsider their feelings for each other.

Air Date: May 11, 2009.

Quote from Raj

Raj: Well, I'm a Hindu. My religion teaches that if we suffer in this life we are rewarded in the next. Three months at the North Pole with Sheldon and I'm reborn as a well-hung billionaire with wings.

Quote from Howard

Leonard: Howard, this is big science. You could be the engineer who builds the equipment that puts us on the cover of magazines.
Howard: I could also be the engineer who builds the crossbow that kills Sheldon.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Leonard, you may be right. It appears that Penny secretly wants you in her life in a very intimate and carnal fashion.
Leonard: You really think so?
Sheldon: Of course not. Even in my sleep-deprived state, I've managed to pull off another one of my classic pranks. Bazinga!

Quote from Howard

Howard: Easy. Instead of saying; 'No we don't wanna go on an NSF expedition,' say; 'No we don't wanna spend three months stuck in a cabin in the Arctic Circle with an anal nutbag!'

Quote from Leonard

Sheldon: Everyone at the university knows I eat breakfast at 8:00 and move my bowels at 8:20.
Leonard: Yes, how did we live before Twitter?

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: I don't think I can go to the North Pole.
Sheldon: OK, Leonard, I know you're concerned about disappointing me, but I want you to take comfort from the knowledge that my expectations of you are very low.

Quote from Mrs. Wolowitz

Mrs. Koothrappali: I told you no. Why don't you believe me?
Mrs. Wolowitz Cause it doesn't make sense to me. How can it be that in the entire country of India, there isn't one Outback Steakhouse?

Quote from Mrs. Wolowitz

Howard: Ma, I'm putting you on speaker-phone with Raj's parents. Can you tell them that you're okay with me going to the Arctic?
Mrs. Wolowitz Arctic? I thought you said Arkansas.

Quote from Howard

Sheldon: Did Han Solo let Luke Skywalker freeze to death on the Planet Hoth? No, he opened a Ton Ton to keep his body temperature from plummeting.
Howard: You heard the man, hold him down and I'll cut him open.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: This is to train for a three month expedition to the magnetic North Pole.
Penny: What?!
Sheldon: I don't know how that sentence could possibly confuse you, but to elaborate, I'm going to the Arctic Circle with Leonard, Wolowitz and Koothrappali.

Quote from Howard

Raj: Is this just so we won't touch your stuff while you're away?
Sheldon: I'll admit that was a concern, but the fact is I'll need a support team, and the three of you are my first choice.
Howard: Really?
Sheldon: Well, there are others who might be more qualified, but the thought of interviewing them gave me a stomach ache.

Quote from Raj

Raj: But if we were part of the team that confirmed string theory, we could drink for free in any bar in any college town with a university that has a strong science program.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Wait a minute. He offered to send you to the North Pole?
Sheldon: Yes. In fact, he was quite enthusiastic. He said, "Frankly, if I could send you tonight, I would."

Quote from Leonard

Sheldon: I'm a theoretical physicist, a career I chose in no small part because it's indoors. But if I'm able to detect slow-moving magnetic monopoles there, I will be the first scientist to confirm string theory. People will write books about me. Third-graders will create macaroni-art dioramas depicting scenes from my life.
Leonard: Sure, maybe a tableau of me trying to pummel you to death.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I'm not good with cold, Leonard. How often have we had to leave a movie theater because I got a headache from drinking the Icee too fast? I can't go.

Quote from Sheldon

Leonard: Sheldon, what are the words I can say right now to end this conversation and let me go back to sleep?
Sheldon: Odd, President Siebert posed the exact same question.
Leonard: How was it resolved?
Sheldon: It wasn't. His wife set the dogs on me, and rendered the question moot.

Quote from Penny

Sheldon: I need access to the Cheesecake Factory's walk-in freezer.
Penny: Now, honey, I already told you, the hamburger meat is fresh and stored at a safe temperature.

Quote from Sheldon

Mrs. Koothrappali: So, she has no problem with her son being eaten by a walrus?
Sheldon: That's very unlikely, Mrs. Koothrappali. If Raj dies, it'll be from frostbite, gangrene, acute sunburn or being ripped to shreds by a hundred pound polar bear.

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: What about the really long hug? What did that mean?
Penny: That wasn't a long hug.
Leonard: It was at least five Mississippis. A standard hug is two Mississippis tops.

Quote from Mrs. Koothrappali

Raj: But mummy, all the other guys are going to the North Pole.
Mrs. Koothrappali: I don't care what the other guys are doing. If the other guys jumped in the Bay of Bengal and tried to swim to Sri Lanka, would you follow them?

Quote from Mrs. Koothrappali

Howard: Dr. and Mrs. Koothrappali, namaste. I understand your concern, but if it'll make you feel any better, my mother is fine with me going. And this is a woman who kept a safety rail on my bed until I was 17.
Mrs Koothrappali: So, she has no problem with her son being eaten by a walrus?

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