Quotes from ‘The Launch Acceleration’

The Launch Acceleration

'The Launch Acceleration' - Season 5, Episode 23

Howard and Bernadette's wedding plans are put in jeopardy when NASA change his mission plans. Meanwhile, Penny is thrown for a loop by a comment Leonard makes in the bedroom.

Air Date: May 3, 2012.

Quote from Mike Rostenkowski

Mr. Rostenkowski: Walnut?
Howard: No, thank you. I'm allergic.
Mr. Rostenkowski: Oh, sure. My partner used to have that. He's dead now.
Howard: From nuts?
Mr. Rostenkowski: Nah, his wife shot him. But she was nuts, so in a way.

Quote from Amy

Amy: We're playing doctor. Star Trek style.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I assume we're talking about you now?
Leonard: Yeah.
Sheldon: So that's how this works, I complain and then you complain and no one offers any solutions?
Leonard: Pretty much.
Sheldon: Well no wonder the women are winning.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Hope you're not thinking about some sort of LSD thought control. Because there's only one mind-expanding drug this man enjoys, and that's called school.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: For example, this morning I was calculating the random motion of virtual particles in a vacuum, when suddenly the particles morphed into an image of Amy's dandruff gently cascading down onto her pale, slightly hunched shoulders. Oh, what has that vixen done to me, Leonard? And how do I make it stop?

Quote from Mike Rostenkowski

Mr. Rostenkowski: It's gonna be okay, son.
Howard: You really think so?
Mr. Rostenkowski: Of course. A pretty girl like Bernadette, she'll find a new guy.

Quote from Mike Rostenkowski

Mike Rostenkowski: Last murder case before I retired. How many bodies do you see there? Careful, i's a trick question.
Howard: Im not sure.
Mike Rostenkowski: Nah, you'll never get it. It's a fraction.

Quote from Mike Rostenkowski

Mike Rostenkowski: When I first met you, I didn't like you.
Howard: I'm aware of that, sir.
Mike Rostenkowski: But then you and I had some time together.
Howard: Uh-huh.
Mike Rostenkowski: It did not get better.
Howard: Right, right.
Mike Rostenkowski: That silly Beatle haircut and you riding around on a red Vespa, and you still living at home with your mother. To be honest, I thought Bernadette chose you to punish me. But then I heard about your astronaut thing, and I realized I judged you too fast. Maybe you are the right guy for my little girl.

Quote from Howard

Howard: Yes, yes, I've been doing my push-ups. I'm still stuck at nine, but that's going all the way down with no one holding me.

Quote from Howard

Howard: Yes! Thank you! Oh! Oh! Im not gonna die in space! Im gonna die the way God intended, in my late 50s, with a heart full of pastrami.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Leonard, these rental tuxedos have been worn by hundreds of sweaty strangers. I don't like my own sweat touching my skin. How do you think I feel about theirs?

Quote from Raj

Raj: Well, that wasn't as entertaining as when he rents bowling shoes, but it was right up there.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I must say, I was surprised you chose to spend our date night in your apartment. As I mentioned, the Pasadena City Council is debating longer crosswalk times. And later, the LEGO store is having a midnight madness sale. You ask anyone, that's a hot date.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: I had a feeling you'd be reluctant, which is why I'm going to dip into my neurological bag of tricks.
Sheldon: Oh, you brain monkeys kill me. Dip away.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: I love strawberry Quik. It's my favorite pink fluid, narrowly beating out Pepto-Bismol.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Can I ask you a question about women?
Leonard: We got you that book last year. Wasn't everything in there?
Sheldon: No, I'm having a relationship problem with Amy. And by the way, that book gave me nightmares.

Quote from Raj

Assistant: Why don't you slip this on?
Sheldon: Said the hangman offering a noose.
Raj: Well, that wasn't as entertaining as when he rents bowling shoes, but it was right up there.

Quote from Howard

Howard: I wasn't worried.
Raj: You weren't?
Howard: Let me explain the difference between you and me. You watch Star Trek. I live it.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Ah, much better.
Leonard: You must be burning up.
Sheldon: A little. But not more than your urethras will be after whatever's in those pants swims up them.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Well, I cut quite the dashing, yet hygienic figure, don't I? I look like the Flash about to get married.

Quote from Sheldon

Sheldon: Oh! A tissue! A tissue! Oh, good Lord!
Assistant: Uh, where's he going?
Leonard: He keeps emergency Purell in the car.
Sheldon: Keys! Keys! Keys!

Quote from Leonard

Penny: Well, I've been thinking, and maybe I'm ready to take things a little faster.
Leonard: Oh, great. And I promise, after waiting four months, fast is what you're gonna get.

Quote from Leonard

Penny: You know, just-just one thing. Look, we're in a really great place right now, and I don't want to do anything that will make stuff all weird again.
Leonard: So we won't let it get weird.
Penny: Okay. Oh, and just a heads-up, mm, since the last time you saw me naked, I got a Cookie Monster tattoo. The acceptable responses when you see it are awesome or nothing.
Leonard: What about ... (in a low voice) Cookies!

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Seven o'clock, right on time.
Sheldon: It's not an accident. I waited outside your door for twenty minutes.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Tempting choices, but I have something special planned for tonight.
Sheldon: What can be more special than having an adequate amount of time to cross the street on your way to buy a tiny LEGO Indiana Jones?

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: With our friends moving forward in their relationships, I've decided that we should make progress in ours as well.
Sheldon: Oh, dear Lord. Two years ago, we didn't even know each other, and now I'm in your apartment after dark. How much faster can this thing go?

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Human beings form emotional attachments as they grow up. In your case, to your mother, superheroes, et cetera. I'm going to attempt an experiment that will get you to transfer those feelings to me.
Sheldon: Well, it seems what's on the menu tonight is malarkey with a big side of poppycock.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: We'll see. Let's start with a little romantic dinner music, shall we?
Sheldon: Super Mario Bros. theme?
Amy: Yes.
Sheldon: I see what you're doing. You're attempting to build on the work of Ebbinghaus by triggering an involuntary memory of me playing that game, admittedly the happiest 600 hours of my childhood, but it won't work.

Quote from Sheldon

Amy: Oh, I know. I think it will go nicely with what I have prepared for dinner.
Sheldon: Spaghetti with little pieces of hot dog cut up in it!
Amy: Just like your mommy used to make.
Sheldon: Oh yummy, yummy! We should do this more often. Uh-oh.

Quote from Penny

Leonard: I'm sorry. I- I crossed a line. I didn't mean to!
Penny: Who says something like that right in the middle of sex?
Leonard: I don't know, it just came out. People say weird things during sex all the time.
Penny: Okay, well, they sure as hell don't say that.
Leonard: It was the heat of the moment.
Penny: No, the heat of the moment is, ooh, yeah, just like that, not will you marry me?
Leonard: I'm sorry. Just, just give me another chance.
Penny: Why, so you can crawl under the covers and go, hey, baby, want to go look for houses in neighborhoods with good schools?

Quote from Leonard

Leonard: Okay, at some point, we'll look back and this is going to be a funny story. Why don't we just start doing that now?
Penny: You're kidding.
Leonard: No. Hey, do you remember that time when I proposed to you in bed? And you were all, like, what are you doing? That was so funny. So funny.
Penny: It's not funny.
Leonard: Give it a minute. Is that a little smile I see there? I should go.

Quote from Howard

Howard: Hey, I was thinking. For our first dance at the wedding, what if we learn the final number from Dirty Dancing?
Bernadette: You're kidding.
Howard: No, come on. How cool would that be? Me running into your arms, you lifting me up into the air.

Quote from Leonard

Sheldon: Bishop to queen four, level two. Check.
Leonard: Sheldon, knight takes bishop. You all right?
Sheldon: I'm fine.
Leonard: Are you? You left your queen exposed from above, you trapped your knight in the corner, and you keep sighing and saying, why me?

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