Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 68 of 73

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Quote from the episode The Monetary Insufficiency

Sheldon: I'm not waiting for the university to come around. I'll find another way to raise the money.
Raj: Ooh, if it's one of those booths where we can throw a pie at you, I'm in for, like, 20 bucks.
Howard: 40 bucks if I can throw a DVD player.

Quote from the episode The Hot Tub Contamination

Bernadette: Is it me, or is there something fun about watching him just float there?
Howard: Maybe this is why people get fish tanks.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Raj: The only threesome I've ever had in my life, and I'm proud to say it was with this man right here.
Howard: Oh, please shut up.

Quote from the episode The Fish Guts Displacement

Howard: How's that dinner coming?
Bernadette: I just put it in. It's gonna be a while.
Howard: I like rare chicken. Let's do this.
Bernadette: You could die.
Howard: (To Mike) Death by chicken. That's a pretty fowl way to go.

Quote from the episode The Tenant Disassociation

Sheldon: No, that means it's Chinese food night.
Penny: Yeah, and you have Chinese food. So eat it.
Sheldon: But I can smell your pastrami.
Howard: And we can all hear your complaining, so no one's happy.

Quote from the episode The Stag Convergence

Howard: Thank you for picking us up. There's a warning, right there, on the Scotch bottle. "You cannot be operatin heavy machinery after you had a snootful of this, laddie!"

Quote from the episode The Fish Guts Displacement

Howard: So, Mrs. Rostenkowski, you took that trip to the Grand Canyon. How was it?
Mrs. Rostenkowski: It was good.
Howard: Had no idea you were the chatty one.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: Howard, I want you to know that I forgive you.
Howard: I'll take it.
Leonard: What's he forgiving you for?
Howard: Don't care. Clean slate. Happy Yom Kippur to me.

Quote from the episode The Novelization Correlation

Sheldon: I know that you were on Wil's show, and I know why you didn't tell me.
Howard: Do you?
Sheldon: Because you were afraid that I would be difficult and annoying about it.
Howard: (chuckles) I hope your book has a twist as surprising as that.
Leonard: It doesn't.

Quote from the episode The Santa Simulation

Bernadette: Saturday night? But I've been working late all week. That was gonna be our night.
Howard: But I have to go. We play as a group. If I'm not there, then everyone will blame you. They'll be all, Bernadette ruined everything. She's the worst. So, you see? I have to play Dungeons and Dragons for the marriage.
Bernadette: You're an idiot.
Howard: I'm your idiot. Forever!

Quote from the episode The Extract Obliteration

Sheldon: Earlier today, I invited Professor Stephen Hawking to join me in the popular online game Words with Friends. Moments ago, he accepted my request. Do you understand what that means?
Howard: That somewhere right now Stephen Hawking is saying, "Damn it, I mean to click no."

Quote from the episode The Fish Guts Displacement

Bernadette: Hey, Dad, maybe you could take Howard fishing sometime. Give you guys a chance to get to know each other better.
Howard: No, no. We know each other well enough. He's been talking my ear off all night.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Leonard: I'm not just giving it to my friend, Barry. Your proposal is also in the mix.
Howard: Wait, so those are the three? You're not even considering mine? Why, because they're PhDs and I'm just an engineer?
Leonard: No, because they wrote detailed proposals, and you sent a YouTube clip of the guy from Jerry Maguire saying, "Show me the money!"

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Howard: I can tell you're stressed. If it helps, I withdraw my proposal.
Leonard: It doesn't help.
Howard: Fine. Then I'm back in the mix. Show me the money!

Quote from the episode The Thespian Catalyst

Howard: Look. Listen to this one. Does Einstein's theory explain why time flies when you're having fun, but when you're listening to Dr. Cooper, it falls out of the sky, dead?

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