Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 2 of 66

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Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Raj: Oh, this is amazing. I wish I had a playhouse like this when I was a kid.
Penny: Really? You never had a playhouse?
Raj: No. I mean, my dad did buy the house next door for us to play in.

Quote from the episode The Grant Allocation Derivation

Bernadette: Hey, Howie, can you give me a hand? I need to get some work done, and the kids are climbing all over me.
Raj: You know what? I'll watch them.
Bernadette: You sure?
Sheldon: But I was just about to tell everyone why they're called Pennsylvania Dutch when they really hail from Germany.
Raj: Yep.

Quote from the episode The Imitation Perturbation

Sheldon: Oh, Inspector Gadget. And I want to say Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg.
Raj: So close. Kooth Bader Ginsburg. The Notorious KBG.
Sheldon: That's very clever.
Raj: [striking a gavel] Sustained.

Quote from the episode The Imitation Perturbation

Leonard: Are you gonna dress in drag in front of your fiancee?
Raj: Yeah. We have no secrets from each other. Well, except for the fact that I crocheted this myself.

Quote from the episode The Imitation Perturbation

Howard: You're sitting in my spot.
Sheldon: You don't have a spot. What is wrong with you today?
Raj: Maybe he's cranky because he's off his bathroom schedule.

Quote from the episode The Imitation Perturbation

Leonard: Sheldon, he's being you. He's dressed as you for Halloween.
Sheldon: Oh. So you're not laughing at him. You're laughing at me.
Raj: We're not laughing at you. We're laughing with you.
Sheldon: But I'm not laughing.
Raj: Then the first one.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Howard: Thank you, Raj, that was a really nice introduction.
Raj: Well, it's from my heart. So, Howard, you are in an elite group. Only 232 people have ever been on the International Space Station. How does that make you feel?
Howard: Honestly, lucky. Most astronauts have to train their whole lives. I was just in the right place at the right time.
Raj: Oh, please, luck had nothing to do with it. You people need to know how impressive this man is. He was up there because he's the only one qualified to install a piece of equipment that he designed.
Howard: Thanks, but if you want to talk impressive, this guy right here discovered a planetary object outside the Kuiper belt.
Raj: He worked on the Mars rover.
Howard: He helped launch the New Horizons space probe.
Raj: He went to space on a Russian rocket.
Howard: And I was scared the whole time.
Raj: And I was scared for you, but also proud.
Howard: Wow. I don't think you've ever said that to me before.
Raj: I should have, and I'm gonna say it again. I'm proud of you. You're my best friend, and I love you.
Howard: Aw, Raj, I love you, too.
Bernadette: What is happening?
Raj: Bring it in, spaceman, you've been cleared for landing.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Raj: Hey.
Leonard: Hey.
Raj: I brought Chinese.
Penny: Oh, that's a nice surprise. What's the occasion?
Raj: Please, I don't need a reason to bring food to my friends.
Leonard: But you have one, don't you?
Raj: Yeah, I need your help.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Howard: I just want to let you know I get why you don't want me to be a part of the planetarium show.
Raj: Oh, great. Thanks for stopping by.
Howard: You don't want to talk about the stars next to an actual astronaut. That would be like doing karaoke with a rock star.
Raj: First of all, I've totally done karaoke with a rock star. Or are you forgetting when the Spin Doctors handed me the mic at the Orange County Fair?

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Howard: Listen, I understand you being intimidated, but I can't help that I'm proud of being an astronaut. It's a big deal.
Raj: Oh, it certainly is, but I also happen to be very accomplished in my field.
Howard: Great. So you have no reason to be scared of sharing the spotlight.
Raj: Please. I may be scared of heights and spiders and showing up at a costume party that turns out to be a regular party, but I am not scared of sharing the spotlight with you! [Raj walks out, and then reappears]
Howard: What's happening?
Raj: I just stormed out for dramatic effect. I- Actually, I don't have anywhere to go.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Raj: Recently, 12 new moons were discovered orbiting Jupiter, bringing the total up to 79.
As a middle child myself, I'd like to extend my sympathies to moons two through 78. Your grandpa will never learn your name. I'd like to thank you for joining me on this journey through the stars. If you enjoyed this lecture, please come back Thursday for the exact same one.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Raj: Oh, Howard, uh, this is Andrea. She's the director of the planetarium.
Andrea: Hi.
Howard: Nice to meet you. I'm Howard Wolowitz. Engineer, husband, father, astronaut.
Andrea: Really? You're an astronaut?
Howard: Well, I don't like to brag.
Raj: Hmm, yeah, but somehow, you manage.

Quote from the episode The Planetarium Collision

Andrea: Raj, you should have Howard join you for one of your shows.
Howard: Oh, that might be fun.
Raj: It might be, but with two small children at home and a full-time job, I'm sure you're too busy.
Howard: No, I could find the time.
Raj: Well, you don't have to decide right now.
Howard: It's okay, I-
Raj: He can't do it.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Raj: What the hell did you two say to Anu?
Bernadette: Uh, whatever do you mean?
Raj: Why, why would you tell her I wear ladies' deodorant?
Penny: Uh, because you're a boy and it's really funny.
Raj: Oh, oh, okay. Pardon me for having the confidence to smell daisy-fresh.

Quote from the episode The Tam Turbulence

Tam: So, is he here?
Leonard: Uh, no. He didn't come. He's, uh, he's still pretty upset about ... you know.
Tam: I know what?
Leonard: Come on, you-you must know.
Tam: No, we haven't talked in, like, 20 years.
Howard: Right. Because ... you know.
Raj: I don't think he knows.
Tam: What are you guys talking about?
Leonard: Why did you and Sheldon stop being friends? What did you do?
Raj: And don't worry, even though we just met you, we think you're right and he's wrong.

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