Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 35 of 56

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Quote from the episode The Separation Oscillation

Raj: I can't believe you made out with Mandy Chow.
Leonard: Oh, trust me I wish it never happened.
Raj: And you knew about this the whole time?
Howard: I did.
Raj: And you didn't think to tell me?
Howard: Leonard asked me to keep it to myself.
Raj: Let's leave Leonard out of this for the moment. This is about you and me.

Quote from the episode The Separation Oscillation

Leonard: Are we done?
Raj: Not yet. This is fun.
Ooh, I know. I'd let her free my willy.

Quote from the episode The Relaxation Integration

Raj: Look, Ruchi and I are really hitting it off. Please let me just have this one!
Stuart: I'm not going anywhere. I'm like a fungus you can't get rid of.
Ruchi: Sorry. So what's going on?
Raj: Oh, you just missed Stuart's funny story about the fungus he can't get rid of.

Quote from the episode The Proposal Proposal

Raj: Hello, Ramona.
Ramona Nowitzki: Mm. Hello.
Raj: Why are you sitting by yourself? Oh, that's right, Sheldon's in New Jersey being engaged to Amy.
Ramona Nowitzki: I heard.
Raj: Now that Sheldon's out of the picture, I could give you one more chance to go out with me.
Ramona Nowitzki: Nope, I'm good.
Raj: You sure? I will not ask again.
Ramona Nowitzki: I sincerely hope not.
Raj: Very well. I'm going to leave before this gets awkward.

Quote from the episode The Proposal Proposal

Raj: This is going to be the biggest smackdown since my Aunt Noopur showed up at the family reunion wearing the same sari as my cousin Sruti.

Quote from the episode The Bus Pants Utilization

Raj: I think we should take a picture to capture this moment.
Leonard: Yeah! (Fart noise)
Raj: Was that the best 99 cents I ever spent, or what!

Quote from the episode The Wiggly Finger Catalyst

Howard: He likes your eyes.
Raj: You're making me sound like a caveman.
Howard: She says, "thank you, and you have nice eyes, too."
Raj: Really? Ask her how many children she wants, and whatever number she says, say me too.
Howard: No.

Quote from the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Ramona Nowitzki: No, my work doesn't leave me a lot of time for relationships.
Raj: I think you made that very clear.

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Leonard: Why don't we play this smart? Try a little good goblin, bad goblin.
Priya: Oh, dear Lord.
Howard: Nah, I think we have to be more subtle.
Raj: Okay, I see where this is going. Fine, I'll have sex with him.
Leonard: That's not where it was going.
Raj: Good, because I would hate that.

Quote from the episode The Holiday Summation

Raj: You know, in India when my baby brother cried like that, the servants would just take him far away so we couldn't hear it. (Howard and Bernadette stare at him) Not always, sometimes we'd leave.

Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil

Bernadette: I really appreciate the thought, but it's not necessary. I'll be back soon.
Ruchi: Don't worry about work. You take all the time you need.
Raj: Yeah, just turn off your brain and let your uterus do its magic. It's the star of the show now.

Quote from the episode The Egg Salad Equivalency

Leonard: She knows I have a girlfriend. It's so weird.
Raj: Oh, my God. You're loving this.
Leonard: To my bones. I mean, I'm not gonna do anything about it. I love Penny. It's just nice to have a young, attractive woman sniffing around the goods.
Raj: I both hate you and want to be you. This is Ryan Gosling all over again.

Quote from the episode The Engagement Reaction

Leonard: Every once in a while, before we'd go to bed, I'd put on a little show for her.
Raj: What do you mean, a show?
Leonard: Well, you know, the way I took my clothes off.
Raj: Like, to music?
Leonard: I'd look pretty stupid if there was no music.
Raj: So you'd do a striptease?
Leonard: I wasn't swinging around a pole.
Raj: Good, good.
Leonard: There was one time I put body glitter on.
Raj: Well, I don't think you have to worry about Penny telling my sister that.
Leonard: No, she wouldn't.
Raj: Your big problem is me telling her.
Leonard: You really are a mean little man.

Quote from the episode The Egg Salad Equivalency

Leonard: What do you guys think I should do?
Raj: I say you tell Alex your heart belongs to Penny, I provide her a shoulder to cry on, and then roughly half a year later I give it to her good.

Quote from the episode The Zarnecki Incursion

Leonard: Did your sister say anything when you got home last night?
Raj: Oh, no, don't put me in the middle of this. I'm not going to be your go-between.
Leonard: Come on, help me out. Am I in trouble?
Raj: There's no reason to worry.
Leonard: That's a relief.
Raj: I'm sure many women in happy relationships spend their nights Skyping with their ex-boyfriend Sanjay.

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