Sheldon: It has been some time since we had a woman take her clothes off in our apartment.
Leonard: That's not true, remember at Thanksgiving, my Grandmother with Alzheimer's had that episode?
Sheldon: Point taken, it has been some time since we had a woman take her clothes off after which we didn't wanna rip our eyes out.
Leonard: The worst part was watching her carve that turkey.

Kurt: How the hell did you get in the building?
Leonard: We're scientists.
Sheldon: Tell him about our IQ.

Sheldon: Wine and a girl in the dark. He's going to be bored out of his mind.

Leonard: Sheldon, this is not your home!
Sheldon: This isn't anyone's 'home'. This is a swirling vortex of entropy.

*Sheldon spots Amy Farrah Fowler outside the apartment*
Sheldon: Oh dear... they really do be crazy.

Sheldon: Good grief. It's like talking to a dolphin.

Sheldon: Penny for your thoughts?

Koothrappali: Oh, great. No Superman, no Wonder Woman? All we've got is a skinny Flash, an Indian Aquaman, a near-sighted Green Lantern, and a teeny, tiny Dark Knight.
Sheldon: Obviously, we're no longer a Justice League. We have no choice but to switch to our Muppet Baby costumes.
Koothrappali: Ooh, I call Kermit.
Sheldon: I'm Kermit. You're Scooter.
Koothrappali: Oh, man. Scooter sucks. He's the Aquaman of the Muppet Babies.

Amy: Gentlemen, as much as I'm sure Sheldon would enjoy playing intergalactic make-believe, he and I have other plans. We are attending my Aunt Flora's 93rd birthday party. Sheldon: Just tell her I can't come. Amy: She'll be disappointed if we don't show up. Sheldon: She's 93. She won't be disappointed for very long.

Sheldon: (To Amy) Do you have any idea what it's like to wait for years and never know if you're finally going to get satisfaction?

Leonard: Will you stay out of this?
Sheldon: If only Penny had said that once in a while.

Sheldon: Amy, if you want to be my girlfriend again, I really want to be your boyfriend.
Amy: I really want that, too.
Sheldon: Good, because I love you.
Amy: I love you, too.
Dave: Kiss her, you brilliant fool!
(Sheldon kisses Amy)
Sheldon: Well, I'll let you get back to your date.

Sheldon: You know, it's amazing how many super villains have advanced degrees. Graduate schools should do a better job of screening those people out.

Penny: Well, my question is, and I'm pretty sure I know the answer, is this your first date?
Sheldon: That depends. Does square-dancing with my sister at a Teens for Jesus 4th of July Hoe-down count as a date?
Penny: No.
Sheldon: Then, this is my first date.

Raj: I don't wanna sit by myself.
Sheldon: That's what Typhoid Mary said and clearly, her friends buckled.