Latest Quotes Page 3 of 395
Amy: Is there anything we can do?
Bernadette: Sure. Open up a college fund, shop for life insurance, and in the laundry room, there's a mountain of dirty laundry. Wash it or burn in, your choice.
Leonard: So you're gonna throw me under the bus?
Penny: Oh, I'm gonna throw you so hard, I might actually win a stuffed animal.
Penny: You know, how is this any different from you making me live with Sheldon?
Sheldon: Hey! I shared my Honey Nut Cheerios with you.
Penny: You gave me a bill at the end of every month.
Leonard: What's going on with that woman you're dating?
Raj: I broke up with her.
Raj: She said she didn't want to see me anymore and I found that insulting.
Leonard: He really worked with the Drug Enforcement Agency?
Penny: He didn't know it 'til he was cuffed, but yeah.
Leonard: Well, I'm sure he'll appreciate carrying his samples in a briefcase instead of his colon.
Sheldon: Now, when the robots rise up, they'll know that I've been rooting for them the whole time.
Raj: Maybe I'll just play the field.
Howard: Yeah, the field was just here. The field said no.
Sheldon: Of course you're fine. Not every member of a species finds a mate. Sir Isaac Newton died a virgin. Look at the contributions he made.
Raj: I'm not a virgin, Sheldon.
Sheldon: Wha- So now you think you're better than Isaac Newton?
Amy: Aww, I remember signing our first Relationship Agreement.
Sheldon: You seem to be forgetting the "no nostalgia" clause.
Leonard: I would pull this car over and kick you out, but if Penny dumps me, you're all I got.
Sheldon: At our age, why don't we call it man's night?
Leonard: Because we just spent our allowance on comic books.
Penny: Pink wine and pizza bagels? It's like eighth grade all over again.
Penny: Is it normal for the husband to kind of completely stop giving a crap?
Bernadette: Uh-oh, what's going on?
Penny: Well, Leonard used to do all these things, like bring me flowers and wear pants.
Howard: Yeah, got to get her hooked on TV, or someday, she'll want me to play outside.
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