Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 2 of 70
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Quote from the episode The Closure Alternative
Howard: People change names on blogs to protect their privacy. Roger is Raj.
Raj: Oh, I always thought if I had a white name it would be Gavin.
Quote from the episode The Fortification Implementation
Raj: So, how's it going with the ti
Howard: Great, it's all done. The lawyer tracked down my father and got him to sign it over. I didn't have to meet him, I didn't have to talk to him, I don't even know where he is.
Raj: Wow, so you're not curious at all?
Raj: What if he's in prison? What if he's a spy? What if he's in a Beatles cover band? I'm just saying, if he's got your nose and haircut, he'd make a killer Ringo.
Quote from the episode The Comic Book Store Regeneration
Raj: Yeah, Mrs. Wolowitz was pretty special. When I first moved to America, Howard was my only friend, and she made me feel so welcome in her home. Which says a lot, because those first few years she thought I was the gardener.
Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution
Leonard: I've always been a little confused about this. Why don't Hindus eat beef?
Raj: We believe cows are gods.
Sheldon: Not technically. In Hinduism, cattle are thought to be like God.
Raj: Do not tell me about my own culture, Sheldon! In the mood I'm in, I'll take you out, I swear to cow!
Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture
Sheldon: Teams are traditionally named after fierce creatures thus intimidating one's opponent.
Raj: Then we could be the Bengal tigers.
Sheldon: Poor choice. You know, gram for gram no animal exceeds the relative fighting strength of the army ant.
Raj: Maybe so, but you can't incinerate a Bengal tiger with a magnifying glass.
Quote from the episode The Adhesive Duck Deficiency
Wolowitz: You're such a douche
Raj: Who cares? You slept with your cousin!
Quote from the episode The Robotic Manipulation
Leonard: I'd suggest using some lubricant, but I have a feeling you fell on that as well.
Howard: Not funny, Leonard.
Raj: Really? A robot hand’s got a death grip on your junk, dude. That’s funny, ask anyone.
Quote from the episode The Thanksgiving Decoupling
Raj: It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without an Indian providing the food.
Quote from the episode The Einstein Approximation
Raj: Okay, just to be clear, roller skating was my idea, and I'm very unhappy that you turned it into a double date. I hope you both fall on your asses and break your coccyxes.
Sheldon: The plural of coccyx is coccyges.
Raj: Screw you. Give me back my lima beans.
Quote from the episode The Engagement Reaction
Howard: Hell hound.
Raj: Who let the satanic dogs out?
Quote from the episode The Weekend Vortex
Raj: But excuse me, I have something to say. None of you may realize it, but I was very much looking forward to this weekend. It was gonna be like the old days -- the four of us hanging out, playing video games, before you guys all got girlfriends. Do you have any idea what it's like to be the only one without a girlfriend? Even if I get one someday, I'll still be the guy who got a girl after Sheldon Cooper!
Quote from the episode The Jiminy Conjecture
Raj: Ooo, big talk from a man who was once treed by a chicken.
Quote from the episode The Grasshopper Experiment
Raj: How can I be a gynaecologist? I can barely look a woman in the eye!