Howard: Sheldon, I owe you an apology. Taking the train was a stroke of brilliance. I've actually got a shot with a Terminator.
Raj: Oh, please. When it comes to Terminators, you've got a better shot of scoring with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

Raj: You fail to take into account that even mute, I am foreign and exotic. While you, on the other hand, are frail and pasty.

Raj: It's hot in here. It must be Summer.
Summer Glau: That's cute.
Raj: Really? I just made it up. Have you seen Slumdog Millionaire?
Summer Glau: Oh, yeah, I loved it.
Raj: It's loosely based on my life.

Raj: And that bright little star peeking her head out early today, that's Venus.
Summer Glau: That is so cool. You really know a lot about space.
Raj: Come on. When you were on TV in Firefly, you were actually in space.
Summer Glau: You're not one of those guys who really believe that, are you?
Raj: You mean one of the hopeless geeks? No. Those are crazy people. Howard, be a dear and get me another one of these. Now, him, he's one of those geeks.

Raj: Actually, in India, the names of constellations are different. Where you have the Big Dipper, we have the Big Curry Pot.
Summer Glau: You're making that up.
Raj: You got me. Now what are you going to do with me?

Raj: We need a plan. How about Operation Hammer of the Gods?
Leonard: I forget, which one is Hammer of the Gods?
Raj: We hide behind the dumpsters in the parking lot and ambush people when they come to pee.

Howard: Just for the record, we're not in an ersatz homosexual relationship.
Raj: Well, then why didn't you say that to her?
Howard: Why is it always my responsibility?
Raj: It's not always your responsibility. I swear, this is the same thing you did at the comic book store last week.
Howard: I can't believe you're bringing that up.
Raj: I didn't bring it up. You did.
Howard: We'll talk about this later.
Raj: You always say that, but we never do.

Raj: If anyone cares, I still have to pee.

Rajesh: Die, Toaster, Die!

Sheldon: Is it wrong to say I love our killer robot?
Rajesh: As with my father I both love and fear it.

Raj: Okay, what shall be the first to taste the wrath of MONTE?
Leonard: Maybe we should start small.
Raj: Okay, oh, perhaps today is the day we finally find out what's inside the Magic 8 Ball.
Sheldon: Did it when I was 4. It's an icosahedral die floating in tinted blue water.
Raj: Man, call spoiler alert before you say things like that.

Raj: I'm curious, what part of America is that accent from?

Raj: "Kandorian dry cleaner-" I give up, you can't have a rational argument with this man.

Raj: Whoa. Humongous man crush, dude.

Howard: Hey. Nice sweater.
Leonard: Yeah, Stephanie got it for me. It's kind of fun.
Raj: It's got a big bird on it, dude.
Leonard: Yeah, yeah, that's the fun part. We're also getting new curtains for my bedroom, and a dust ruffle, and a duvet, and I don't even know what a duvet is but I'm pretty sure if I did I wouldn't want one, but every time I talk to her about moving out she cries and we have sex.
Raj: You're lucky. With me, it's usually the other way around.