Sheldon: We're trying to think down here, you geode-loving feldspar jockeys!

Sheldon: Did that conversation include the phrase "your genitals are a joy to behold"?
Alfred Hofstadter: Look, I promise you, neither I, nor anyone, has ever said that.
Leonard: You don't know his girlfriend very well.
Sheldon: Or what a joy it is to behold my genitals.

Amy: Sheldon, I understand your apprehension, but let me appeal to the scientist in you. Given the five-week end-date, isn't it the perfect opportunity to consider this an experiment and collect data on our compatibility?
Sheldon: Don't try luring me in with sexy talk.

Sheldon: No matter where I am, this will always be my spot.

Amy: Comfy?
Sheldon: Oh, I'm just happy I don't know what this memory foam remembers.

Sheldon: Being with Amy has awoken the sexual creature within. When I see a pretty gal walking down the street, I think, "hubba hubba" like any other guy.
Penny: You kiss your mother with that mouth? 'Cause it's fine.

Sheldon: Why would she keep something from me, you know? I shared my body with that woman. And my Netflix password. They recommended "Stella Got Her Groove Back" because of her.

Sheldon: Everybody wants to spend more time with me. I'm like a man made of sugar in a world of ants.

Leonard: Buddy, buddy, listen, nothing bad is going on, she just she just didn't want you to know that the work on her apartment was finished a couple weeks ago.
Sheldon: I don't understand.
Leonard: She's enjoying living with you and she didn't want it to end early.
Sheldon: So, she's deceiving me in order to spend more time with me?
Leonard: Yes.
Sheldon: Oh. Well, I feel both flattered and hurt. Like when people say I look like that skeleton from Nightmare Before Christmas.
Raj: Oh my God, that's who you look like.

Sheldon: And you realize what the next step is?
Amy: Set up a second culture and try to replicate our results.
Sheldon: Uh, no. We lock that door, lower our underpants a little, and make a baby.

Sheldon: How much will it hurt?
Amy: It's just a tiny skin sample. You saw me do it to myself.
Sheldon: On a scale of one to ten, where one is a pebble in your shoe and ten is the monkey you thought was your pet biting your face off.
Amy: A two.
Sheldon: Eating a whole Altoid?

Sheldon: Who leaves their bike in the hallway? You know, if I knew how to ride one, I'd steal it.

Penny: She said not to come. It's gonna be a while.
Amy: (sighs) Well, first deliveries can be slow.
Sheldon: I am starting to rethink the Flash onesie I bought this kid.

Amy: I guess I guess we should stop.
Sheldon: Yeah, I'm afraid so. Childbirth, looming coitus? This is a banner night for female genitals.

Sheldon: It was fine, other than the weird-tasting juice Amy gave me. I slept the whole way.