Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 249 of 262
Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis
Leonard: You're going march yourself over there right now and apologize.
Sheldon: Pfffft.
Leonard: What's funny?
Sheldon: That wasn't sarcasm?
Leonard: No!
Sheldon: Oh. Boy, you are all over the place this morning.
Quote from the episode The Guitarist Amplification
Sheldon: Where exactly does the half-sandwich come from? Are you giving me half of someone else's sandwich, or do I have to wait for someone in the restaurant to order the other half?
Quote from the episode The Big Bran Hypothesis
Sheldon: I have a masters and two PhDs. I should not have to do this.
Quote from the episode The Codpiece Topology
Leonard: Sheldon. Don't make that noise, it's disrespectful.
Sheldon: I should hope so. It was a snort of derision.
Quote from the episode The Jiminy Conjecture
Penny: Hey Sheldon, whattcha got there a new comic book?
Sheldon: Old comic book. I just got it from the safe deposit box.
Penny: What do you have a safe deposit box for?
Sheldon: Old comic books.
Quote from the episode The Euclid Alternative
Sheldon: I was otherwise engaged.
Penny: Doing what?
Sheldon: I was examining perturbutive amplitudes in N=4 supersymeteric theories leading to a re-examination of the ultraviolet properties of multiloop N=8 supergravity using modern twistor theory.
Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture
Leonard: Come on, you need a four-person team. We're four people
Sheldon: By that reasoning we should also play bridge, hold up a huppah and enter the Olympic bobsled competition.
Quote from the episode The Pants Alternative
Sheldon: Now to the astronomers in the audience, get ready to see the dark side of the moon. Now here's Uranus!
Quote from the episode The Psychic Vortex
Leonard: What's going on?
Sheldon: We scored. I'm the wingman.
Quote from the episode The Staircase Implementation
Sheldon: Oh, Ubuntu. You're my favorite Linux-based operating system.
Quote from the episode The Bat Jar Conjecture
Sheldon: You want me to use my intelligence in a tawdry competition? Would you ask Picasso to play Pictionary? Would you ask Noah Webster to play Boggle? Would you ask Jacques Cousteau to play Go Fish?
Quote from the episode The Pork Chop Indeterminacy
Sheldon: Eat this slice of cheese without farting and you can sleep with my sister.
Quote from the episode The Dumpling Paradox
Sheldon: I'll watch the last 24 minutes of Doctor Who, although at this point it's more like Doctor Why Bother.
Quote from the episode The Vartabedian Conundrum
Sheldon's computer: We are out of herbal tea. Do you have any?
Penny: Okay, let me check.
Sheldon's computer: Some hiney would be nice.
Penny: Hiney?
Sheldon's computer: Honey.
Quote from the episode The Bad Fish Paradigm
Leonard: How could you just sit there and let them spy on me?
Sheldon: They were very smart. They used my complete lack of interest in what you are doing.
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