Sheldon: As usual, you're all wrong. The bravest person in the Marvel universe is the doctor that gives Wolverine his prostate exam.
Howard: How about the guy gets a prostate exam from Wolverine?

Penny: Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here. Just letters.
Sheldon: That's the wrong box. Put it back.
Penny: Oh, Sheldon, are these letters from your grandmother?
Sheldon: Don't read those letters.
Penny: Oh, look, she calls you Moon Pie. That is so cute.
Sheldon: (shrieking) Put down the letters!

Sheldon: [to Leonard] I don't know what your odds are in the world as a whole, but as far as the population of this car goes, you're a veritable mack daddy.

Sheldon: (knock, knock, knock) Penny!
(knock, knock, knock) Amy!
(knock, knock, knock) Bernadette!

Sheldon: We have a bowl. Our keys are in the bowl. You should get a bowl.
Penny: I just don't understand; how can beautiful mind of Sheldon Cooper forget his keys in the first place?
Sheldon: I left them in the bowl.

Penny: Anything else?
Sheldon: Yes. If you use my toothbrush, I will jump out that window. Please don't come to my funeral. Have a good night.

Chen: Hi, fellas. Oh, where's your annoying little friend who thinks he speaks Mandarin?
Sheldon: He's putting his needs ahead of the collective good. Where he comes from, that's punishable by death.
Chen: I come from Sacramento.

Penny: Looks like you've been to the Renaissance Fair ... I'm hoping.
Sheldon: Renaissance Fair? More of a medieval-slash-Age of Enlightment-slash-any-excuse-to-wear-a-codpiece fair.

Sheldon: That's preposterous. I do not resemble C-3PO. Don't get me wrong, I'm flattered. I just don't see it.

Penny: Mmm, what smells so good?
Sheldon: That is the intoxicating aroma of Kadhai Paneer. A perfect culinary representation of the freedom this evening holds. Not only is it Indian cuisine, which Koothrappali loathes, it contains a generous helping of peanuts, which would reduce Wolowitz to a wheezing 97-pound blister. And finally, its main ingredient is paneer, a farmer's cheese that would cause Leonard to render any room uninhabitable within minutes.

Sheldon: I just want you both to know, when I publish my findings, I won't forget your contributions.
Howard: Great.
Sheldon: Of course, I can't mention you in my Nobel acceptance speech. But, when I get around to writing my memoirs, you can expect a very effusive footnote and perhaps a signed copy.

Sheldon: You fellas are planning a party for me, aren't you?
Howard: Okay, Sheldon, sit down.
Sheldon: If there's going to be a theme, I should let you know that I don't care for luau, toga, or under the sea.

Sheldon: Fellow warriors, this is Sheldor the Conqueror. We are about to enter Atzel's fortress. Now, this is a long run, so let's do another bladder check. All right, Barry, we'll wait for you again, but you really should see a doctor.

Sheldon: I'm not going to say I told you so, but we could have killed him.

Sheldon: This is now the only lab with glassware washed by a man with two doctorates and a restraining order signed by Carl Sagan.
Amy: Soap spots. Wash them again.