The Big Bang Theory - The Vartabedian Conundrum Quotes

Stephanie: *Looking in Sheldon's ear with an otoscope* I don't see anything at all Sheldon.
Sheldon: Ahh, Well you're the doctor but I am constantly hearing this annoying sound.
Leonard: Me too.
Sheldon: Is it a high frequency whistle?
Leonard: No its more of a relentess narcassistic drone.

Leonard: No absolutely not!
Sheldon: It's not a big deal.We have latex gloves.  
Leonard: I don't care what the symptoms are, my girlfriend is not going to give you a prostate exam.

Leonard: Don't you think if a woman was living with me I'd be the first one to know about it?
Penny: Oh sweetie you'd be the last to know about it

Sheldon: I trust Leonard satisfied you sexually last night.
Leonard: Oh good God! Sheldon we don't ask questions like that!
Sheldon: I heard you ask it over and over. How is it inappropriate for me to ask it once?
Stephanie: He did very nicely.
Sheldon: See? She's not offended. And now you FINALLY have an answer.

Sheldon's computer: We are out of herbal tea. Do you have any?
Penny: Hold on, I'll go check.
Sheldon's computer: Some hiney would be nice. (Sheldon realizes his mistake right away)
Penny (offended): Hiney?
(Sheldon retypes)
Sheldon's computer: Honey.