Bernadette: Still, I can't believe you can turn ordinary skin cells into functioning brain cells.
Amy: Well, I turned this one into a functioning boyfriend, so sky's the limit.

Amy: I gave you one job! Keep an eye on him. How hard is that?

Amy: If you're keeping him, I've got a cage you can borrow. One of the test monkeys slipped on a banana peel and broke his neck. It was both tragic and hysterical.

Bernadette: It would mean so much if you would be the maid of honor at my wedding.
Amy: What? Wait is this some kind of practical joke? Like in Norway when my "friends" trapped me in a sauna with a horny otter?

Sheldon: What is your problem?
Amy: It's Valentine's day. We're supposed to be having a romantic weekend.
Sheldon: Oh, really? 'cause I remember you saying this trip was going to be something we could both enjoy. Did you mean that or were you just trying to trick me?
Amy: Fine, it's true. I deserve romance and I didn't know how else to make it happen.

Sheldon: Well, wait. What if, just this once, we suspend the date night parameters and you stay later?
Amy: Well, as long as we're suspending the parameters. I could stay really late and we could have our first sleepover.
Sheldon: That's a big step.
Amy: It's a big fort.

Sheldon: Perhaps I should explain. While working with Koothrappali, we discovered an asteroid, and I named it after you.
Amy: Oh, Sheldon, thank you. That's so romantic. But what about Rajesh? He was okay with you choosing the name?
Sheldon: Well, it took a little negotiating, but I wore him down. Uh, we get the asteroid, and if you and I have children, they all have to be named Rajesh.
Amy: All of them?
Sheldon: Even the girls.
Amy: Okay, I think I know what to say now.

Penny: Howard and Bernadette's kid might be born on your birthday. How cool is that?
Amy: Yeah, but I thought this baby was supposed to ruin their sex life, not mine.

Bernadette: Besides, Penny and I are having a girl's night tonight.
Amy: Girls night, what does that entail?
Bernadette: Oh you know, girls get together hang out share girl talk.
Amy: I'm a girl.
Bernadette: Oh well maybe you could join us. I'll ask Penny.
Amy: No need, Penny and I are very close.
Leonard: You are?
Amy: Yes, In fact our mensies are synchronized.

Amy: Can you see how a grown man and accomplished scientist who invests in a store that sells picture books about flying men in colorful underwear might be wasting both his financial and intellectual resources?
Sheldon: No.
Amy: Then I think it's a terrific idea.
Sheldon: Great! Wait until you hear about our van.

Amy: Sheldon, that was beautiful.
Sheldon: If you didn't press record-
Amy: I pressed it!

Sheldon: The conductor said if I come back to the engine room, he'd show me how to take the train through a crossing.
Amy: Okay. Have fun.
Sheldon: Do you want to come with me?
Amy: Really? I do!

Amy: A guest in my trundle bed and a boy at my door. I wish I could tell thirteen-year-old me it does get better.

Sheldon: Are you suggesting I play dirty?
Amy: Yes, dirty. Dirty, dirty, dirty. Which brings me to our next order of business. [kisses Sheldon]
Sheldon: Fascinating.
Amy: I hope you don't take what I'm about to do as a comment on what we just did. [runs to bathroom and vomits]

Penny: You know Amy, when we say we're having girl talk, it doesn't mean that we just have to talk about our ladyparts.
Amy: That's a shame. I had a real zinger about my tilted uterus.