Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 5 of 67

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Quote from the episode The Wildebeest Implementation

Sheldon: Red is angry, yellow is frightened, green is jealous and blue is depressed. Perhaps we can assign a color to lonely.
Raj: Nothing rhymes with orange. Its probably lonely.
Sheldon: All right. Come in. You look positively orange with loneliness. No, I dont see that catching on at all.

Quote from the episode The Apology Insufficiency

Raj: I can't talk to the FBI.
Howard: Why? They're just going to ask background questions about me.
Raj: I'm brown and I talk funny.

Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Raj: No, I'm not gay. If anything, I'm metrosexual.
Dr. Koothrappali: What's that?
Raj: It means that I like women, as well as their skin-care products.

Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution

Rajesh: Okay, please don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather swim buck naked across the Ganges with a paper cut on my nipple and die a slow agonizing death from a viral infection, than work with you.

Quote from the episode The Alien Parasite Hypothesis

Sheldon: What is the best number? By the way, there's only one correct answer.
Raj: 5,318,008?
Sheldon: Wrong! The best number is 73. [Short silence] You're probably wondering why.
Leonard & Howard: No no, we're good.
Sheldon: 73, is the 21st prime number, its mirror 37 is the 12th and its mirror 21 is the product of multiplying, hang on to your hats, 7 and 3. Did I lie?
Leonard: We get it! 73 is the Chuck Norris of numbers!
Sheldon: Chuck Norris wishes! In binary, 73 is a palindrome, 1001001, which backwards is 1001001, exactly the same. All Chuck Norris gets you backwards is Sirron Kcuhc!
Raj: Just for the record, when you enter 5,318,008 in a calculator, upside down it spells boobies.

Quote from the episode The Guitarist Amplification

Raj: Sorry doesn't make up for the fact that I had to cook chicken and rice with this vegan guy. You know what vegan chicken and rice is? It's rice!

Quote from the episode The Griffin Equivalency

Raj: Hey, buddy, I'm gonna be in People Magazine.
Charlie Sheen: Yeah, call me when you're on the cover.

Quote from the episode The Bakersfield Expedition

Raj: Insurance will replace your car, it won't defunk my junk.

Quote from the episode The Engagement Reaction

Raj: Rotting Zombie. Sheldon's new Facebook picture.

Quote from the episode The Friendship Turbulence

Bernadette: Raj, your tag's sticking out. *Bernadette tucks Raj's clothing tag back in*
Raj: Thank you. That's the closest I've come to sex in like two years.
Bernadette: Now I feel a little gross.
Raj: You're only making it seem more real for me.

Quote from the episode The Love Car Displacement

Howard: What, I'm not hot enough for Angelina Jolie?
Raj: Id like to weigh in here: No.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Raj: Incredible. You managed to screw up the screw up.

Quote from the episode The Space Probe Disintegration

Raj: Seriously, you were just gonna drive away? Like my life isn't hard enough right now? A space probe might be destroyed. My parents are going through an awful divorce. The guy who cuts my dog's hair just gave her bangs.
Howard: Raj!
Raj: You saw her. She looks like Jim Carrey from Dumb & Dumber!

Quote from the episode The Mystery Date Observation

Raj: You're not wrong about Fruit Stripe. I-I was always a Hubba Bubba man.
Howard: Hubba Bubba over Dubble Bubble? You're crazy.
Raj: Hey, the jaw wants what it wants.

Quote from the episode The Proton Transmogrification

Howard: You sure? Not even coffee? We have R2-Decaf. Maybe a nice Cafe au Leah.
Raj: And if you're not in the mood for coffee, I can always make you a Chai Tea-3PO.

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