Raj Koothrappali Quotes Page 5 of 70

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Quote from the episode The Transporter Malfunction

Raj: No, I'm not gay. If anything, I'm metrosexual.
Dr. Koothrappali: What's that?
Raj: It means that I like women, as well as their skin-care products.

Quote from the episode The Guitarist Amplification

Raj: Sorry doesn't make up for the fact that I had to cook chicken and rice with this vegan guy. You know what vegan chicken and rice is? It's rice!

Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution

Rajesh: Okay, please don't take this the wrong way, but I'd rather swim buck naked across the Ganges with a paper cut on my nipple and die a slow agonizing death from a viral infection, than work with you.

Quote from the episode The Pirate Solution

Raj: I'm going to be deported. Sent home in disgrace. Exposed to the sardonic barbs of my cousin Sanjay or, as you may know him, Dave from AT&T customer service.

Quote from the episode The Thanksgiving Decoupling

Raj: It wouldn't be Thanksgiving without an Indian providing the food.

Quote from the episode The Griffin Equivalency

Raj: Hey, buddy, I'm gonna be in People Magazine.
Charlie Sheen: Yeah, call me when you're on the cover.

Quote from the episode The Bakersfield Expedition

Raj: Insurance will replace your car, it won't defunk my junk.

Quote from the episode The Hot Troll Deviation

Raj: Oh, you're so arrogant. If you were a super hero your name would be Captain Arrogant. And do you know what your super power would be? Arrogance.

Quote from the episode The Mystery Date Observation

Raj: You're not wrong about Fruit Stripe. I-I was always a Hubba Bubba man.
Howard: Hubba Bubba over Dubble Bubble? You're crazy.
Raj: Hey, the jaw wants what it wants.

Quote from the episode The Space Probe Disintegration

Raj: Seriously, you were just gonna drive away? Like my life isn't hard enough right now? A space probe might be destroyed. My parents are going through an awful divorce. The guy who cuts my dog's hair just gave her bangs.
Howard: Raj!
Raj: You saw her. She looks like Jim Carrey from Dumb & Dumber!

Quote from the episode The Friendship Turbulence

Bernadette: Raj, your tag's sticking out. *Bernadette tucks Raj's clothing tag back in*
Raj: Thank you. That's the closest I've come to sex in like two years.
Bernadette: Now I feel a little gross.
Raj: You're only making it seem more real for me.

Quote from the episode The Tangerine Factor

Raj: Incredible. You managed to screw up the screw up.

Quote from the episode The Line Substitution Solution

Raj: Boy, all this standing's making me tired. Good thing I brought my collapsible stick chair.
Howard: Not the stick chair. You look like an idiot on that thing.
Raj: Sticks and stones may break my bones, but chairs on sticks are comfy.

Quote from the episode The Engagement Reaction

Raj: Rotting Zombie. Sheldon's new Facebook picture.

Quote from the episode The Leftover Thermalization

Howard: All Ma's food is going to be ruined.
Bernadette: Why don't we take it home and put it on our freezer?
Raj: You don't want to do that. Refreezing not only removes moisture, but it creates ice crystals in the fibres of the meat that can compromise its taste and texture. What? I saw a teachable moment. I dropped some culinary science.

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