Sheldon: Play that funky music, white boy.
Leonard: I'm surprised you know that reference.
Sheldon: What reference?

Amy: I had one too, but I didn't have any friends so all I did was serve.
Bernadette: You know you can leave one side up and play against it.
Amy: And if I had a friend, they might have told me that.

Penny: We had one of these growing up. I used to play all the time.
Raj: Oh yeah, I loved ping pong.
Penny: Oh, I meant beer pong.

Sheldon: Leonard, I've been working on an opening joke for our lecture at Berkeley.
Leonard: Oh, I like to laugh. But say it anyway.

Penny: You know when they chase you out of there, you only have to run faster than Sheldon.

Sheldon: What do you say to a graduate of the U.C. Berkeley Physics Department? I'll have fries with that. Because his education hasn't prepared him for a career in the sciences.

Penny: You still worried some Berkeley girl's gonna steal him away?
Amy: Yes. Who do you think gave him the danger whistle?

Sheldon: I don't see what's crazy about bringing a backpack with your own toilet paper and Purell.
Leonard: Keep going.
Sheldon: And rubber gloves, and air freshener. Noise cancelling headphones. Oh, danger whistle. Umm, pepper spray. Ooh, a multi-language occupied sign. Let's see, we have seat protectors, booties for my shoes, a clothes pin for my nose. Oh, and, a mirror on a stick so I can make sure the person in the stall next to me isn't some kid of weirdo.

Leonard: So, where do you want to hang it?
Penny: Are you kidding? We're not hanging it.
Leonard: But it's an expression of our love.
Penny: And our butts. Not hanging it.

Sheldon: What if I told you that I added your name to the cable bill?
Leonard: No.
Sheldon: That's just as well. They had me on hold for 20 minutes. I hung up.

Howard: Certainly a lot more women are reading comic books now.
Stuart: It's true. In the store, I had to put a seat on the toilet.

Sheldon: I have mixed feelings about interviews. I like the part where I talk, but I do not like the part where the other man talks.

Leonard: New salon topic: What's more important-- an idea or its execution?
Bernadette: Oh, that's fun.
Sheldon: Good for you, Leonard. That's a lovely little notion. Kind of like "I wish I could talk to my uncle in Chicago." Yeah, and I'll stand back while I invent the telephone. *holds invisible telephone to ear* Hello? Oh, hold on. Leonard, it's your uncle. He says you just got burned.

Sheldon: All he had was an idea.
Amy: Well, that is an important part.
Sheldon: Oh, please. I have ideas all day long: Reverse SeaWorld where dolphins are allowed to pet people; a new clothing size between medium and large called "Marge"; Snow White retold from the point of view of Sneezy. Why won't Doc prescribe him something? We finally find out.
Amy: Well, Leonard's idea was good.
Sheldon: Fine, then Grumpy. What's he so grumpy about? Maybe his girlfriend won't take his side.

Howard: All Ma's food is going to be ruined.
Bernadette: Why don't we take it home and put it on our freezer?
Raj: You don't want to do that. Refreezing not only removes moisture, but it creates ice crystals in the fibres of the meat that can compromise its taste and texture. What? I saw a teachable moment. I dropped some culinary science.