Season 11 Quotes Page 1 of 87
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Howard: Bernie, this is our kid's name. I think we should both agree.
Bernadette: You're right. We both made this baby.
Howard: Thank you.
Bernadette: And I carried it, had to stay in bed for four months, sacrificed my body and my job, and soon it's gonna burst its way out of me like the Kool-Aid Man.
Howard: Exactly. Fifty-fifty.
Bernadette: At the office, I have two assistants! I don't even know their names. I just call them Thing 1 and Thing 2.
Amy: I don't have assistants.
Bernadette: I guess that's one of the benefits of being in the private sector. That and all the money I make!
Bernadette: One of the great things about being pregnant is drinking cranberry juice out of a wineglass and watching people freak out.
Sheldon: Sorry, but when you make a discovery like this, you don't just take it down to City Hall. You tell the whole world. And so I'll say it in Latin or Klingon or smoke signals, if that's not cultural appropriation.
Amy: It is.
Sheldon: Okay, so not smoke signals.
Sheldon: Amy, I usually know exactly what to say. But in this moment I have no words.
I guess I'm overwhelmed by you. In a good way. Not in the elevator in the Haunted Mansion way. Even if I can't tell you now how I feel, I will spend my life showing you how much I love you.
Barry Kripke: At wast, my wove has come awong, my wonewy days are over, and wife is wike a song, oh, yeah.
Quote from the episode The Proposal Proposal
Sheldon: I've thought about it, and I really want to spend the rest of my life with Amy. Do I have your blessing?
Stephen Hawking: Well, Sheldon, I think you should make her finger like Saturn and put a ring on it.
Bernadette: What about this?
Raj: Uh, okay. Uh, pull off the skirt, slap a lightning bolt on the front, and you got baby Flash. Ooh, stick a long sleeve under it. Boom, Baby Sheldon!
Penny: No, I've been reading Bernadette's parenting book. It's like the answer key to the Sheldon test.
Sheldon: Until next week, this is Professor Proton saying, 01000010 01111001 01100101. That's "Bye" in ASCII binary, or good-binary.
Raj: Are you saying that you don't believe two people fall in love?
Ruchi: Of course they do. It's just that what people call "love" is actually a series of biochemical reactions in the brain that fade over time.
Raj: Yes. Like the old song, "When a man has a biochemical reaction for a woman."
Howard: Why would the military want Sheldon?
Leonard: I don't know. Target practice?
Penny: Leonard thinks when we broke up, it didn't bother me.
Zack: That's crazy. When we were going out, she used to talk about you all the time. In fact, I think she only dated me because I reminded her of you.
Leonard: Sure. Because we're both people?
Zack: Damn right we are.
Sheldon: Neither of them will be the actual cake. I'm just using it as a bargaining chip to get Amy to agree to the whole wedding party getting rings and us getting one ring to rule them all.
Howard: I forget, which mental hospital are you guys registered at?
Howard: Look, I I can see you're upset, but I'm gonna need some ground rules. I mean, while we're apart, can I see other needy Indian men?