Amy: Sheldon, I'm really impressed you're willing to try this.
Sheldon: Admittedly, this brushes up against my well-known aversions to heat, small places, going below floor level, dampness, hatches, ladders, darkness, echoes, and eliminating in Home Depot buckets. That last one is quite new, but I have a feeling that's going to rocket to the top of the list.

Leonard: Thanks again for having us.
Howard: Of course. What do you guys want to talk about?
Penny: Well, now that we're engaged, we have some questions about how you handle money as a couple.
Bernadette: Told you they weren't going to ask us to swing with them.

Sheldon: Miners often sang mining songs to keep their spirits up.
Raj: You know any mining songs?
Sheldon: Just the hits.

Raj: Okay. How about a little Miley Cyrus next?
Sheldon: Who's he?

Howard: Oh, you're saying I don't do anything around here? Look at my chore chart!

Leonard: She made him a chore chart.
Penny: I see it!

Howard: "Do the dishes", there's a star right there.
Bernadette: That was a pity star. Putting water in the roasting pan and putting it in the sink is not doing the dishes.
Howard: That pan had to soak and you know it!

Bernadette: Well don't come crying to me when you don't get your allowance.
Howard: It's not an allowance. It's a stipend! And we said we weren't going to call it an allowance in front of my friends.

Sheldon: We'll take some funions.
Amy: Anything else?
Sheldon: Some York Peppermint Patties, a couple of Dr. Peppers, and run to Best Buy and see if they have a portable DVD player and Season 1 of a show called Hannah Montana.
Raj: Have her get Season 2. In Season 1 it was still finding itself.

Penny: If I do well in sales, I could end up making a lot more money than you.
Leonard: Not a problem. I grew up with a mother who emasculated my father financially and in every other aspect of his life, so really it's what I think love looks like.

Sheldon: "Sheldon's Mine Simulation Log, entry 4: My KitKat has melted. All is lost."

Raj: You call yourself a friend? I was trying to help you. And at the first sign of trouble you ran away, leaving me to fend off a family of rats! You're a completely selfish human being and a physical & moral coward.
Sheldon: His statements of the obvious continue to annoy.

Raj: (fanning himself) Oh, this heat is brutal!
Sheldon: As someone from the tropical sub-continent of India, you should know that fanning yourself in a humid environment only raises your body temperature.
Raj: Huh. That does explain why the servants used to look so hot while they were fanning me.

Sheldon: I know the real reason you never made progress with that idea. You thought of it September 22nd, 2007. Two days later, Penny moved in and so much blood rushed to your genitals, your brain became a ghost town.

Sheldon: I remember it distinctly because I had just finished writing my poem commerating the anniversary of Dr. Seuss's death.
Howard: No one wants to hear it.
Sheldon: Why die? Why did he die? All told, I was told he was old.