Bernadette: This wasn't supposed to happen. We were careful.
Penny: Yeah, I didn't even think you could get pregnant while you were breastfeeding.
Bernadette: Well, guess what? You can!

Bernadette: Howard's not here.
Raj: Oh, I know, he's been in the lab every night this week with his work wife.
Bernadette: That's weird, I thought his work wife was standing in my kitchen.

Bernadette: I just did what I did because I love you so much, and the thought of losing you is more than I can handle.
Howard: Really?
Bernadette: You're my soul mate. This is where you kiss me.

Howard: Do you realize what a big deal this is? What an honor it is to be chosen to go into space?
Bernadette: Yeah, I get it. I just wish you included me in the decision. We're supposed to be partners. We're supposed to be a team.
Howard: I'm sorry. You're right. Okay, let's try this again. Bernadette, an opportunity has come up that impacts both of us, and I'd like to discuss it.
Bernadette: Okay.
Howard: I've been offered a chance to go up to the International Space Station for three weeks. What are your thoughts on that?
Bernadette: Well, first of all, thank you for including me in the decision-making process.
Howard: Hey, we're a team. So, what do you think?
Bernadette: No.
Howard: No?
Bernadette: No.

Howard: All right, well, something's obviously bugging you. What is it?
Bernadette: I just can't believe you signed up for the space program without even talking to me.
Howard: Oh, I get it. You're worried about me. That is so sweet. You know, there's a saying we have at NASA. What makes the right stuff so right is that it always comes home.
Bernadette: Just stop talking, Howard.

Howard: You're really quiet. Is everything okay?
Bernadette: Fine. Just a little tired.
Howard: I hope not too tired, because I'm feeling particularly masculine right now. All systems go, if you catch my drift.
Bernadette: I always catch your drift.

Raj: Bernadette, remember, your character's the healer in our group. You're in charge of healing all of us, not just Howard.
Bernadette: I can't help it. My Howie Wowie has an owie.

Bernadette: Get that guy! Get that guy! Pew! Pew! Pew! Pew!
Sheldon: Dr. Rostenkowski, it may interest you to know that saying pew, pew, pew isn't as effective as pressing your blaster key. In the same way that saying whee doesn't make the land speeder go.
Bernadette: (aiming at Sheldon) Pew!

Bernadette: Well, she's nine months old, so unless it jingles or is in my bra, she doesn't care.

Bernadette: One of the great things about being pregnant is drinking cranberry juice out of a wineglass and watching people freak out.

Penny: I'm so glad you talked Howard out of having your wedding invitations in Klingon.
Bernadette: Turn it over. I'm hoping my relatives think it's Hebrew.

Amy: I'm just saying that my research may actually change the world forever.
Bernadette: I hope it does. 'Cause I'm going to see that world from a yacht so big you could land a helicopter on it!

Amy: You're right. We both do important work. I'm trying to map the structures of the brain and you're trying to convince people that itchy hair is a real thing.
Bernadette: It is a real thing! It happens to be a side effect of our cholesterol drug.

Bernadette: At the office, I have two assistants! I don't even know their names. I just call them Thing 1 and Thing 2.
Amy: I don't have assistants.
Bernadette: I guess that's one of the benefits of being in the private sector. That and all the money I make!

Amy: The more I told him about my lab, the pissier he got. You know what he said to me? He said, "I hope all your correlations turn out to be specious."
Bernadette: He said that to your face? What a dick.