Howard Wolowitz Quotes Page 60 of 66

Searching Search quotes

Quote from the episode The White Asparagus Triangulation

Howard: Don't spritz him with that body spray from the commercials where the women undress when they smell it? That doesn't work at all. No matter how much you put on.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Penny: Howard, didn't you say you worked on the Mars Rover?
Howard: No, you're mistaken.
Penny: Yeah, when we first met, you said that if I went out with you, I could drive a car on Mars.
Howard: I don't know what you're talking about.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Penny: Yeah, I remember specifically. You started by asking if I was from Mars because my ass was out of this world.
Howard: Well, that does sound like me, but no.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Howard: I got the Mars-rover stuck in the ditch.
Sheldon: Where?
Howard: On a dusty highway just outside Bakersfield. Where do you think?! On Mars!

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Howard: May I say Penny, not a lot of women could look as hot as you do with such greasy hair.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Howard: Kind of a "Mars rover, Mars rover, can Howard come over?" situation.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Howard: Mock me if you will, but it works. You show up at a club in something distinctive, scope out your target and toss out some negs.
Raj: What are negs?
Howard: A neg is a negative compliment that throws a pretty woman off her game. Like "Normally, I'm not turned on by big teeth, but on you, they work." I've got a whole list of em. Who wants to be my wingman?
Leonard: You're not gonna need wingman, you're gonna need a paramedic.

Quote from the episode The Lizard-Spock Expansion

Sheldon: You brought a girl to the Mars Rover control room?
Howard: Yeah, I picked her up in the bar. She's a doctor. One free barium enema and my mother won't care she's not Jewish.
Leonard: Wait a minute, so the eye patch and the insults worked?
Howard: No, there were three other guys with eye patches, it was a fiasco. What did work was, "How'd you like to visit a secret government facility?"

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Raj: Hold on a second. Kreplach??
Howard: Yeah.
Raj: That isn't Klingon. It's yiddish for meat-filled dumpling!
Howard: Well, as it turns out it's also a Klingon word.
Leonard: Really? Define it.
Howard: Kreplach a hearty Klingon.....dumpling.

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Sheldon: Excuse me, Penny, but-
Leonard: Don't tell her.
Sheldon: We're playing Klingon Boggle.
Leonard: Aww!
Howard: What do you mean "Aww?" Like she didn't know we were nerds?

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Sheldon: (On computer screen) Hello, puny insects, as a consequence of your efforts to circumvent my will, everyone is awarded one additional strike.
Leonard: Thanks a lot, Howard.
Howard: What are you complaining about? I'm the one who has to take the class again.

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Wolowitz: If it's "creepy" to use the Internet, military satellites, and robot aircraft to find a house full of gorgeous young models so I can drop in on them unexpected, then fine, I'm "creepy".

Quote from the episode The Panty Pinata Polarization

Penny: Hey, guys. What'd I miss, what'd I miss?
Howard: Giselle's hanging by a thread.
Penny: Oh, good, I hate her.
Howard: Then you're not invited to our wedding.

Quote from the episode The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem

Penny: Whats Sheldon's deal? Is it girls, guys, sock puppets?
Howard: We operate on the assumption that Sheldon has no deal. Though we have many theories about how he might reproduce. I'm an advocate of mitosis.
Penny: What?
Howard: I believe that one day Sheldon will eat an enormous amount of Thai food and spilt into two Sheldons.

Quote from the episode The Cooper-Nowitzki Theorem

Raj: I love this time of the year. The leaves are turning, there's a bracing chill in the air.
Howard: Plus there's a whole new crop of female grad students about to put on just enough winter weight to make them needy and vulnerable. That's right, honey, have another calzone. Daddy can wait.

Showing quotes 886 to 900 of 987Sort by  popularity | date added | episode

Submit Quotes