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Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: Because there's only one of me, I'm more valuable.
Penny: Right.
Sheldon: Although, Amy's already taken me out of my package and played with me.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Raj: She's clearly having a working lunch and preferred to eat alone.
Ramona Nowitzki: Dr. Cooper, over here.
Raj: I could have made her very happy.
Leonard: You kept walking. I think you did.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: I've learned some fun facts about New Jersey to help you make small talk. Would you like to know the state bird or the murder rate? They're both shocking.
Amy: Actually, I want to hear about you. How are things at home?
Sheldon: Well, I'm a lot less likely to see an Eastern Goldfinch or be murdered, I'll tell you that.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Penny: All right. What do you think is happening?
Sheldon: I think Dr. Nowitzki is a friendly colleague. I think you and Leonard need to see a marriage counselor. And I need to update my rsum to include swimming as a special skill.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: That may be true, but Dr. Nowitzki's just a friend. In fact, I wouldn't have even noticed she's a woman if she hadn't worn that bathing suit that highlighted her bosom.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Ramona Nowitzki: Are these all from Peter Higgs?
Sheldon: Hmm? Oh, no, no, no. They're from many famous people. See? Oh, like this one. This is from Patrick Stewart. It says if I come to his house again, I get to meet his dogs.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Penny: Not only did they eat together, Leonard said he made her laugh.
Bernadette: That's nothing, Howie said she touched his hand.
Penny: Did he Purell?
Bernadette: No.
Penny: I cannot believe Leonard mentioned the Toblerone but left that part out.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Amy: I gave you one job! Keep an eye on him. How hard is that?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: *knock knock knock* Amy. *knock knock knock* Amy. *knock knock knock* Amy.
[Amy opens the door. Sheldon is on one knee, holding out an engagement ring]
Sheldon: Will you marry me?

Quote from Howard in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Leonard: He just made her laugh, something's wrong.
Raj: Do you see the way she's looking at him?
Howard: Yeah. Like Bernadette used to look at me.
Raj: I keep telling you, close the bathroom door.
Leonard: Ah, did you see that? She just touched his hand and he didn't swat it away. What is happening?
Howard: Okay, the simplest explanation is usually the right one.
Raj: Which is?
Howard: That ain't Sheldon.

Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Penny: Do you really think there's reason to worry?
Leonard: Yeah, she's definitely going after Sheldon.
Raj: I made a play for her and she shot me down.
Penny: All right, well, that doesn't prove anything.
Bernadette: Yeah, there's a million reasons a woman would shoot Raj down.
Raj: Like, really, a million?
Bernadette: Fine, hundreds.
Raj: Thank you.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Amy: I've been smacking that ketchup bottle for a long time. All she has to do is tip it over and point it at her fries.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: So, tell me about your scalar dark energy experiment.
Ramona Nowitzki: Not 'til you tell me about your latest paper on quantum loop theory.
Sheldon: Oh. You must be one of those dessert before dinner people.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Penny: Well, what do you want us to do?
Amy: I don't know. Might be the New Jersey talking, but this Nowitzki broad needs to disappear.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Long Distance Dissonance

Sheldon: What is Leonard doing calling you at this hour?
Amy: It's not important.
Sheldon: I must tell you, that seems a little inappropriate. Don't you agree?
Ramona Nowitzki: I do.
Sheldon: See? We both think so.

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