Sheldon Cooper Quotes Page 124 of 262
Quote from the episode The Desperation Emanation
Sheldon: Amy, I find myself wondering if we should actually engage in coitus at least one time in our relationship. Bazinga! Bedtime. Please show yourself out.
Quote from the episode The Extract Obliteration
Sheldon: I'll be Coop and he'll be Wheels. If he's okay with that.
Quote from the episode The Cooper Extraction
Amy: I'm just really glad you're back.
Sheldon: Me too. I've got a lot of TV to catch up on.
Quote from the episode The Hesitation Ramification
Leonard: Are you set on people laughing WITH you? Because if you're cool with AT you ...
Sheldon: I don't get it.
Quote from the episode The 21-Second Excitation
Sheldon: (Running from the angry mob) Why is there never a pontoon plane when you need one?
Quote from the episode The Gorilla Experiment
Sheldon: Koko learned to understands over 2000 words, not one of which had anything to do with shoes.
Quote from the episode The Toast Derivation
Kripke: I'm Barry Kripke and I'm here because you told me there was a raffle. Where is the raffle?
Sheldon: Patience, patience, Barry, the waffle-- ahem. The raffle... is the grand finale to an evening-long festival of fun and folly.
Kripke: One more question--
Sheldon: Yes, you must be present to win.
Quote from the episode The Expedition Approximation
Sheldon: "Sheldon's Mine Simulation Log, entry 4: My KitKat has melted. All is lost."
Quote from the episode The Tesla Recoil
Penny: I thought they fired you guys.
Sheldon: They did, but then they hired me back.
Leonard: Well, you better not be working on our project, because we're a team.
Sheldon: Leonard, there is no "I" in team. However, there is an "I" in "I'm working with the military and you're not." There's five of them, in fact.
Quote from the episode The Spaghetti Catalyst
Howard: You're either on Team Leonard or Team Penny.
Sheldon: Which one picks last?
Howard: What?
Sheldon: Well, usually I'm on the team that picks last. Unless there's a kid in the wheelchair.
Quote from the episode The Itchy Brain Simulation
Sheldon: First, talking to you while you're on the toilet isn't exactly a picnic for me either. Remember, when you can hear me, I can hear you.
Quote from the episode The Hook-Up Reverberation
Howard: All I know is he's got my mother buying four ply toilet paper. Four ply! If his butt is so delicate, why doesn't he use an Angora rabbit?
Sheldon: For starters, they shed and bite.
Quote from the episode The Monetary Insufficiency
Sheldon: But I need it. It's the only way to settle the contradictions between gravity and quantum mechanics.
Penny: Well, it's too much money, you can't ask for that all at once.
Sheldon: Well, what if I ask for it in six easy installments of $83,333,333.33?
Quote from the episode The Proposal Proposal
Sheldon: Hello?
Leonard: Oh, hey, where you been? We've been calling you for hours.
Sheldon: Oh, I'm sorry, my phone was on "airplane" mode.
Leonard: Why?
Sheldon: Because I was on an airplane. (makes confused gesture to Amy)
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