Ruchi: Well, moving to a new city was a little scary, but the job seems great. Everyone's really nice.
Bernadette: Oh, they are. Super nice. I mean, only one of them took you out tonight, but it's not a competition.

Raj: Bernie!
Bernadette: Oh, damn.
Stuart: Hey! What are the odds?
Bernadette: Yeah, seren-frickin'-dipity.

Raj: Hello. Rajesh.
Stuart: Stuart.
Ruchi: Hi. Ruchi.
Bernadette: Ruchi is my coworker. But that was probably in your briefing packet.

Amy: I'm just saying maybe there's a part of you deep down that just wants to relax a little, you know? Kick back. Say, "Whatev."
Sheldon: Whatev? I'm sorry, you're really not gonna finish that word?
Amy: I'm just trying to make a point-
Sheldon: Finish the word, Amy.
Amy: Fine. Er. Er, er, er.
Sheldon: Thank you. Only now you owe me three more whatevs.

Raj: Oh, you were born in Trivandrum? Have you ever been to the Kuthira Malika Palace?
Ruchi: No, I haven't.
Raj: Me, either. What a small world.
Stuart: I've also never been there. I've never been lots of places. Go on, quiz me.

Ruchi: I'm sorry, we're being rude talking about India.
Raj: Oh, yeah, you know, if you and Bernadette want to talk about America, that's cool with us. Here, let me get you started. (In an American accent) Hamburgers, am I right?

Ruchi: So, what do you guys do?
Raj: Well, I am an astrophysicist, so if you ever go out at night and look up at the stars, that's kind of my office. He sells comic books to children.

Stuart: Actually, I own my own store. Uh, if you'd like to check it out sometime, I'm running a new promotion: buy anything, get taken out for a reasonably priced dinner.
Raj: Yeah, yeah, Stuart's struggling financially. But he doesn't let that get him down. He believes in himself. Even though the whole world has made it clear he should not.

Stuart: And, you know, Raj, I think it's great that you no longer live off your parents like a spoiled child. You live over someone's garage like a failed adult.
Raj: Yeah, well, you live with her.
Bernadette: Oh, it's not like that. He rents a room from me and my husband. Who, by the way, is no prize, either.

Sheldon: You know me, I just go with the flow. Beach, public pool, they both sound awesome. On second thought, beach. I'd like to befriend a seagull.

Sheldon: What are you listening to?
Amy: Nothing.
Sheldon: Oh, come on, I want to hear.
Sheldon: (on a recording) We don't need GPS. Let's just see where the road takes us.
Sheldon: I see why you turned it off. That guy sounds like an idiot.
Penny: Honey, that's you.
Sheldon: Don't be silly. My voice is deep and sonorous. Like a Caucasian James Earl Jones. "Luke, I am your father." See?

Amy: I couldn't help but wonder if it meant something.
Sheldon: Well, it doesn't.
Amy: Are you sure? I mean, the prefrontal cortex regulates impulse control. So it's plausible that when we're asleep, aspects of our personality that we repress might come out.
Sheldon: Don't try to put science lipstick on your New Age pig! And for the record, you make noises when you sleep, and I've never accused you of repressing your inner chainsaw.

Leonard: If you want me to object at your wedding, just give me one of these. (taps on his nose)

Raj: I'm just saying, you should bow out.
Stuart: Why should I bow out?
Raj: Uh, because we all know how this is gonna end.
Stuart: That's what my doctor said, too, but I'm still here.

Raj: Okay, look, I think that she and I have more in common.
Stuart: Because you're Indian? So just 'cause she's brown, you get to date her?
Raj: Yes! And the next time we meet a woman who's pale and cadaver-like, she's all yours.