Leonard: Sheldon, that was really rude.
Sheldon: I'm sorry. Amy is the one constant I can count on, and now she's changing.
Leonard: It's just a haircut and some clothes.
Sheldon: No, it's the last straw! I can't take any more! [elevator bell dings]
Penny: Can you believe it? They finally fixed the elevator.

Penny: You know, you go on and on about wanting things to stay the same, but you've changed a lot since I met you.
Sheldon: Oh, you are a mean drunk.

Sheldon: Hmm. What kind of tea is appropriate for winning a Nobel Prize and now everything is changing and you feel unmoored from reality?
Leonard: I don't know. Earl Grey?
Sheldon: You know, this is something I've wanted my whole life. But I guess I never considered how everything would be different.
Leonard: Buddy, I-I know it all feels overwhelming right now, but I promise you, things will settle down.
Sheldon: There's no Earl Grey! You filthy liar!

Sheldon: It's happening! [phone chimes] Unknown caller. It's got to be them.
Amy: Okay, put it on speaker.
Sheldon: Hello?
Amy: Hi.
Barry Kripke: Hello. This is Sweden calling. Is this Dr. Cooper and Dr. Fowler?
Sheldon: Yes.
Amy: Yeah.
Barry Kripke: Congratulations. It is my pleasure to inform you that you've won the Nobel Prize in being suckers!

Penny: You know, I've grown, too. I used to be the bartender back there.
Sheldon: That's true. And now there is a completely different woman who botched my drink order. How hard is 65% Coke, 35% Diet Coke?
Penny: Well, judging by the look on her face, it's at least one percent saliva.

Reporter #1: Congratulations. How does it feel?
Amy: Okay, w-we're happy to answer your questions, Just, um, one at a time, please?
Reporter #3: Is Dr. Cooper coming back?
Amy: No. Next question.

Amy: Sounds expensive.
Raj: Excuse me, i-if I'm not mistaken, the Nobel comes with a substantial cash prize. What were you gonna spend it on?
Amy: Hadn't really thought about it. Sheldon's got his eyes on some new Dockers.

Amy: Oh, that's me. It's CVS. My prescription's ready. [phone vibrates] Oh, and also my dad. He says congratulations and he loves me.
Sheldon: Nothing about me? [phone vibrates] Oh. Oh, it's your dad. I'm good.

Bernadette: Please, that doesn't make you his best friend.
Howard: You know, that reporter asked me if I could put him in touch with Amy's best friend.
Bernadette: That's Penny.
Howard: [singsongy:] Doesn't have to be.

President Siebert: Hey, fellas. Can you do me a favor?
Raj: Do we have a choice?
President Siebert: Ha-ha! No. Sheldon and Amy are now officially superstars, and the press will be reaching out to their family and friends for comment.
So that we're all on the same page, the word we're gonna use to describe them is "quirky." And not quirky. More like quirky.
Howard: So not Mr. and Mrs. Wackadoodle?
President Siebert: Ho-ho-ho! You bitter, envious little man.

Sheldon: Oh. Hey, look, that's Bernadette.
Bernadette: [on CNN:] I can't tell you how many times Dr. Fowler was gonna give up and I would say to her, "Amy, as your best friend, I'm not gonna let you quit."
Penny: Okay, I'm drinking again.
Sheldon: I'll join you. Waitress, uh, 95% Hawaiian Punch, five percent vodka.
Howard: [on CNN:] Let me tell you about the time Mr. Nobel Laureate wanted olives.
Bernadette: [on CNN:] This is a good one.
Sheldon: You know what, 90/10!

Sheldon: All this change is just too much. The reporters, the attention at work, and now even Amy's changed. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down.
Penny: I'm playing a drinking game. Every time you say the word "change," I take a slug.
Sheldon: Are you gonna be able to drive me home?
Penny: Mm. Not unless you change the subject. Huh. Now I said it. Meh.

Howard: Did anyone get to slap Sheldon?
Leonard: No.

Raj: Come on. Do something for yourself.
Amy: Well, I suppose I could get a haircut.
Raj: And some makeup and a new wardrobe and a little thank you gift for your shopping buddy if we see something he likes. Come on.
Amy: Where are we going?
Raj: Beverly Hills, where the things he likes are.

Amy: It's weird. I don't really feel different, but I guess our lives will never be the same.
Sheldon: Oh, I don't know. We're going to work like always. I still put my pants on both legs at a time.
Amy: One day that's gonna end very badly.