Season 12 Quotes Page 1 of 84

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Quote from Bernadette in the episode The Donation Oscillation

Anu: Should we go get changed?
Bernadette: Yeah. Hang on a second.
Anu: What?
Bernadette: Just-- I have two babies at home. What am I doing?
Anu: If you don't want to do this, then why'd you come?
Bernadette: To prove to Howard that he doesn't know me as well as he thinks he does.
Anu: Looks like he does.
Bernadette: Unless I do it and then he doesn't.
Anu: Why not just be honest?
Bernadette: You're right. I should be honest. You owe me $3,000 for those plane tickets to India!

Quote from Dr. Koothrappali in the episode The Propagation Proposition

Dr. Koothrappali: Well, that's not going to be our story. Our story is that she's a liar. And-and old. An old, dirty liar.
Raj: Oh, no. She's-she's actually great. I'm the one who screwed up.
Dr. Koothrappali: Well, don't say that to them. She's bad. You're good. They have to pay me back for my wedding deposits.
Raj: (sighs) This is all my fault. I should have I should have just trusted her.
Dr. Koothrappali: So you're saying you still want to get married? Fine. Then I'll call her parents and we'll straighten this whole thing out.
Raj: I don't think she wants to marry me. And honestly she deserves someone better.
Dr. Koothrappali: Rajesh, you need to stop being so hard on yourself. You're a good man.
Raj: Wow. Y-You've never told me that.
Dr. Koothrappali: You're also a dope.
Raj: That you've said.
Dr. Koothrappali: But your heart's in the right place, and you deserve happiness.
So you just need to figure out what you want, and if that means cancelling the wedding, we cancel the wedding.
Raj: Thank you.
Dr. Koothrappali: But figure it out quickly, or I'll be celebrating my next birthday with a lot more elephants and marigolds than I expected.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Propagation Proposition

Dr. Koothrappali: Did you install a camera to spy on your fiancee?
Raj: What?! No!
Dr. Koothrappali: That's what her parents told me when they said they were calling off the wedding. But I told them you would never do such a thing.
Raj: Thank you. I mean, I did install a camera and I did spy on her, but I did not install it to spy on her.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Imitation Perturbation

Amy: Are you guys all dressing up for work?
Howard: Of course. I mean, how often do you get to wear costumes to work?
Penny: Says the man with a giant belt buckle and a dickey.
Howard: Hey, this is not a costume. It's a choice. It's a style.
Penny: It's a tragedy.

Quote from Amy in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Amy: Thank you, your majesties. Thank you to the Nobel Committee. We are deeply honored. I would just like to take this moment to say to all the young girls out there who dream about science as a profession: go for it. It is the greatest job in the world. And if anybody tells you you can't, don't listen. And now, speaking of not listening, my husband, Dr. Sheldon Cooper.

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Sheldon: Thank you, Dr. Fowler. I have a very long and somewhat self-centered speech here. But I'd like to set it aside.
Penny: Yeah!
Howard: Way to go!
Sheldon: Because this honor doesn't just belong to me. I wouldn't be up here if it weren't for some very important people in my life. Beginning with my mother, father, meemaw, brother and sister. And my other family, who I'm so happy to have here with us. Is that Buffy the Vampire Slayer? I was under a misapprehension that my accomplishments were mine alone. Nothing could be further from the truth. I have been encouraged, sustained, inspired and tolerated not only by my wife, but by the greatest group of friends anyone ever had. I'd like to ask them to stand. Dr. Rajesh Koothrappali. Dr. Bernadette Rostenkowski-Wolowitz. Astronaut Howard Wolowitz. And my two dearest friends in the world, Penny Hofstadter and Dr. Leonard Hofstadter. I was there the moment Leonard and Penny met. He said to me that their babies would be smart and beautiful. And now that they're expecting, I have no doubt that that will be the case.
Penny: Thanks, Sheldon. I-I haven't told my parents yet, but thanks.
Sheldon: Oh. I'm sorry. Don't tell anyone that last thing. That's a secret.
Howard, Bernadette, Raj, Penny, Leonard, I apologize if I haven't been the friend you deserve. But I want you to know in my way, I love you all. And I love you. Thank you.

Quote from Raj in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Sarah Michelle Gellar: Just to be clear, this isn't a date.
Raj: Yeah, I know.
Sarah Michelle Gellar: Then why are you holding my hand?

Quote from Sheldon in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Amy: Sheldon.
Sheldon: What? Did you finish? Great job.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Penny: Leonard, I can't go home. I have to be there for Amy.
Leonard: Yeah. I was thinking that, too. As angry as I am at Sheldon, I still want to see him win that medal.
Penny: It's so strange. No matter how thoughtless and selfish he is, I still love him.
Leonard: If you think about it, he has kind of been our practice kid.
Penny: Like when you make pancakes and the first one comes out a little wonky?
Leonard: The university prefers "quirky."

Quote from Penny in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Penny: Okay, that's it for the fish. We'll be back with the meatballs after a short word from our sponsor.

Quote from Leonard in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Leonard: [answering the phone] Hello. Hey. It's Howard. Oh, us, too.
Penny: Wait, what?
Leonard: They're gonna stay. The kids are fine. Bernie's parents took over. Really? Oh, poor little guy.
Penny: Is Michael okay?
Leonard: Yeah, it's Stuart. Bernie's dad gave him a hug, cracked a rib.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Leonard: How long is it gonna take you to get ready?
Penny: Oh, I just need, like, five or ten minutes.
Leonard: Really?
Penny: No. What is wrong with you?!

Quote from Amy in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Sheldon: Well, I hate to say it, but I think everyone is being incredibly selfish.
Amy: Well, you would be the authority on the subject.
Sheldon: What does that mean?
Amy: Sheldon, no one is happier than I am to win the Nobel. But it's not more important than our friends.
Sheldon: How can you call them friends when they're abandoning us?
Amy: They're abandoning us because you broke their hearts.
Sheldon: I didn't mean to.
Amy: I know! You never mean to. That's the only reason people tolerate you!
Sheldon: Does that include you?
Amy: Sometimes, yeah.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Howard: Oh, good, you're here. Listen, we're thinking maybe we should go back to L.A.
Amy: Why?
Howard: We just can't be this far away from the kids. Bernie's having a meltdown, and, frankly, so am I.
Sheldon: Yeah, well, pull it together. This is a big day for me.
Howard: [scoffs] Yeah, I wasn't sure what to do. Now I am. We're going home.
Leonard: We'll join you.
Penny: Oh, wait. Do I get a vote in this?
Leonard: They'll have pickled herring on the plane.
Penny: Bye-bye.

Quote from Penny in the episode The Stockholm Syndrome

Penny: Pickled herring. Who knew how good it was!
Leonard: Really? Sounds gross.
Penny: Looks gross. Smells gross. It's delicious! [knock on door] Ooh, that might be my salted cod!

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