Leonard: How about those two?
Howard: Nah, they're eating peanuts. My allergies, one kiss would put me in Cedar-Sinai for a week.

Sheldon: Yeah, provided he has already read Infinite Crisis and 52, and is familiar with the re-establishment of the DC multiverse.
Penny: What's a multi-verse?
Sheldon: Get her out of here.

Howard: Okay, are you from Star Wars universe?
Leonard: Yes.
Howard: Were you in the original trilogy?
Leonard: Yes.
Howard: Is there a picture of you in my wallet wearing a metal bikini?
Leonard: God, I hope not. And no, I'm not Princess Leia.

Leonard: Look, imagine you maintained a friendship with someone you had sex with, but you were free to date whoever you wanted.
Sheldon: I'm sorry, I can't imagine any of that.

Leonard: Alright, back to the game.
Sheldon: I believe it's my turn, you may begin your questions whenever you're ready.
Raj: Are you Spock?
Sheldon: I don't like this game.

Leonard: Howard, could I borrow some after shave?
Howard: Black case, top compartment.
Leonard: That is a lot of cologne.
Howard: First row are your musks, second is wood, leathers and botanicals, third is assorted pheromones, tread lightly.

Raj: Oh, we should have a plan in case one of us gets lucky.
Leonard: Okay, uh, if I get lucky I'll take her to my stately manor outside Gotham City, and if you get lucky, I'll sleep on the moon.
Raj: Sounds like a plan.

Raj: What's wrong with you dude, that woman was all up in my jammy.
Leonard: Okay, I hate to break this to you and whatever your jammy is, but, I'm pretty sure she is a prostitute.
Raj: What? No.
Leonard: Okay, let me put it this way, in your entire life, how many gorgeous women have walked straight up to you in a bar and asked if you wanted to party.
Raj: Maybe I can save her.
Leonard: Maybe, but I'm guessing it will cost you about $500 an hour to try.
Raj: It was lovely meeting you, best of luck in your future endeavors.

Sheldon: So, how was your day?
Penny: Are you trying to make small talk? Oh, sweetie, you really don't have to.
Sheldon: No, it's the accepted convention. How was your day?
Penny: Well, uh, they shifted my schedule around at the restaurant so my hours are going to be a little different...
Sheldon: I'm sorry, that's not going to interest me at all, just eat.

Mikayla: You want the girlfriend experience.
Leonard: Yes, yeah, exactly, the girlfriend experience.
Raj: Uh, actually, if it's not too much to ask, could we have the Jewish girlfriend experience.

Sheldon: Okay, that's question 20, you have to guess.
Penny: Oh, God, I don't know Sheldon, are you Star Wars?
Sheldon: How can one person be a whole movie?

Sheldon: I was Spock. Are you and Leonard friends with benefits?
Penny: What?
Sheldon: Are you and Leonard friends with benefits?
Penny: Where did that even come from, did he say we were?
Sheldon: No, Leonard said nothing, but who knows what goes on over here when he pretends your mail was mis-delivered.
Penny: No, just mail, no benefits.

Penny: Oh, alright. I will give you my bed on one condition. That you promise to zip your hole for the next eight hours.
Sheldon: May I say one last thing.
Penny: Only if it doesn't rhyme.
Sheldon: Alright. Goodnight.

Sheldon: Sing Soft Kitty.
Penny: That's only for when you're sick.
Sheldon: Homesick is a type of being sick.
Penny: Come on. Do I really have to?
Sheldon: I suppose we can stay up and talk.
Penny: [sings] Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, um…
Sheldon: Sleepy kitty.
Penny: Sleepy ki…
Sheldon: No. Start over.
Penny: [sings] Soft kitty, warm kitty, little ball of fur. Happy kitty, sleepy kitty, purr, purr, purr.

Leonard: Just think. Thanks to your hard work, an international crew of astronauts will boldly go where no man has gone before.